The Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious
Sings Mary Poppins songs forever until the game ends
CREATE THE BEST/WORST CHESS PIECES

the fleet: carries cargo on it's back and when it gets captured it spills all over the board and it can capture your own king once it's captured.

The backward Pawn: It moves like a normal pawn but it can only capture on the two squares diagonally behind it

The jet bomber: Moves like a rook does not move when capturing, throws a bomb that destroys all the pieces standing on the targeted square and the adjacent squares of the targeted square, bombing range: any square in a file that it's standing on

The jester: can teleport anywhere on the board except the spuares that is occupied by other pieces, can dodge a capture three times by moving to the adjacent squares, when it gets captured, there's a small chance it can return to the board, does not move when capturing

The jester: can teleport anywhere on the board except the spuares that is occupied by other pieces, can dodge a capture three times by moving to the adjacent squares, when it gets captured, there's a small chance it can return to the board, does not move when capturing
Plus, it captures Pieces that is two or less squares away it
The jet bomber: Moves like a rook does not move when capturing, throws a bomb that destroys all the pieces standing on the targeted square and the adjacent squares of the targeted square, bombing range: any square in a file that it's standing on
Pretty sure that's not how jet bombers work
B-2: Invisible to your opponent (since it's invisible to radar irl), moves a maximum of 3 squares in any direction (since it's so slow - 1,010 km/h, considered a turtle among military jets), takes all pieces within a 3x3 square when capturing (since it has nuclear capabilities), each player starts with only one (since they're so expensive - $737 million), cannot be promoted (since production ended in 2000), and cannot jump over pieces (since it is not all-weather-capable)

The jet bomber: Moves like a rook does not move when capturing, throws a bomb that destroys all the pieces standing on the targeted square and the adjacent squares of the targeted square, bombing range: any square in a file that it's standing on
Pretty sure that's not how jet bombers work
B-2: Invisible to your opponent (since it's invisible to radar irl), moves a maximum of 3 squares in any direction (since it's so slow - 1,010 km/h, considered a turtle among military jets), takes all pieces within a 3x3 square when capturing (since it has nuclear capabilities), each player starts with only one (since they're so expensive - $737 million), cannot be promoted (since production ended in 2000), and cannot jump over pieces (since it is not all-weather-capable)
...
Yea, I really overkilled that one
How about the F-22: Invisible to your opponent, can move like a queen (unlimited in all directions), is the only piece that can capture the B-2, and can only capture the B-2 (you still can't see it, but you know it's there when 9 squares just empty all of a sudden)

How about the atomic bomb: At any time, preferably when you make a blunder, you can use it and wipe out all of the pieces, enemy and friendly, and then it is a draw. My sister does that whenever I play her.
I feel your pain man
Uno reverse card: When you get checkmated, you win (must be used before the 20th move)

I havent read the whole thing cause long but this looks like fun
The Tree: On a piece of paper you secretly write where you would like to place the tree on your half of the board. Then at the same time you show your opponent the square you have chosen to place your respective trees. The tree sits on that square for the entire game. The Tree blocks checks and cannot be moved through (except by Knights). It cannot be moved and it cannot be captured by any piece except by the King (you can also "cut down your own tree" but only with your king).
Ladies and gentlemen, The Tree!

The Meme: Turns the pieces into memes. Meme Pawn: Doge, can move two squares in any CARDINAL direction. Meme Knight: Surprised Pikachu, is invisible, captures any thing in a 1x1 radius(like a king) Meme Bishop: Pepe, crys, everything in a diagonal explodes. Meme Rook: Sea Food diet, see's piece, eats it. Meme Queen: Buff French Defense Player, loses every game, but punches opponent's queen and king of the board. Meme King: Rick Roll, Rick roll's the board. Every piece gets put on a COMPLETELY random square, also rick roll traps your opponents king so that every time it moves, your opponent has to listen to Never Gonna Give You Up then sacrifice a piece(with no continuation).

The board divider: Every 5 moves, you can move the Board Divider and it will make a new board on the square it moved to. The new board will have the same position and you can move the pieces on the board and if you lose on that board, you lose the game and if you win on that board, you win the game. Moves like a bishop. Notated with the letter D.

The board divider: Every 5 moves, you can move the Board Divider and it will make a new board on the square it moved to. The new board will have the same position and you can move the pieces on the board and if you lose on that board, you lose the game and if you win on that board, you win the game. Moves like a bishop. Notated with the letter D.
Chess-ception
The REET. you have one REET on every square not occupied by a king. They annoy your opponent by showing memes and saying REEEEEEEEEEET.