Monkey moves like a night and king
create the most stupid chess pieces!

The Curse,that makes you blunder and get checkmated
You mean other people have to get them? I was one of the few who were born with one, lol.

The Ultrapiece: can move to every square on the board so the king is checkmated before the first move

The quitter: starts at a2/h7. Moves like a pawn, but instead of promoting, when it reaches a specific randomly chosen rank, it can only move diagonally towards the edge of the board. When it moves off the board, it falls off. If threatened, it moves off the board, and doing so uses up a turn. It can't move into a threat.

The smart pawn: It knows that it could just kindly ask your king for promotion instead of just going to the other side of the board to promote.
a question, what would it be for?
the Poop: it cannot move, if another piece tries to capture it, the Poop will capture the piece (because he has to go wash his shoes off)

The unpromoting king: When a pawn reaches the end of the board, the king resigns to become a pawn and the pawn is forced to become a king.

The smart pawn: It knows that it could just kindly ask your king for promotion instead of just going to the other side of the board to promote.
Now that's work smarter not harder at its finest.
Checker (not this guy 🔴 and this guy⚫️) checks your own king even if you move other pieces