This is Andersen the A pawn. Continue the story.

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he was neither a pawn nor a bishop at this point

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Or a roooooook
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But All the pieces combined into one mega fortress!

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Which then
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Was not fair so it got deleted from all of the chessverses

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Except Andersen
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Which he became a sandwich

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at which point Benko the b-pawn nudged Capablanca the c-pawn and said:

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Howdy stranger