Tom, you don't have to live like a refugee. At move 38 you have what is called an "eternal pin" with your queen (see "The Road to Chess Mastery," page 23). Just look for moves that exploit that, such as 38...g5, threatening ...g4, and ...d3, and I think Black will win.
Sqod is right, you could have just maintained that pin for the win I think. Aside from that you were still completely winning and played a nice French until you inexplicably left your queen hanging. After that you were free fallin.
This is why I hate chess!
It makes me wonder if chess is even a thinkings man game.
It got more in common with those toy spiral games than with thinking games.
Once in a while we have days where we hang queens and allow mates in one. This is just an unfortunate event, so do not think too much about it, considering that you have already achieved completely winning positions in the preceding moves.
I think the game is comedy of errors
This is just an unfortunate event, so do not think too much about it, considering that you have already achieved completely winning positions in the preceding moves.
What eric0022 is trying to say is that it's just one of those things you can never explain, like runaway trains. 
I once had a position where I was too overconfident and missed a mate in one by my opponent.
In the game I was trying very hard to preserve all my five Black pawns in the final position and had intended 36...Nd6 to hold the position, so that 37. b4+ would give an outpost for my knight. Never did I expect 37. b4+ to be mate, 37. b4#.
I hate chess because it takes a long time to get at it. I know a GM who only earns 20,000 a year and lives in the USA. He regrets wasting time to be a GM
@erico sorry for that pawn check
This is why I hate chess!
It makes me wonder if chess is even a thinkings man game.
It got more in common with those toy spiral games than with thinking games.
A game that forces you to pay attention even once winning? Unfair! 
!
31. ... d4 a fork that white cannot wriggle out of. 32. Ne4 Qd5
My goal is to have a good way to exercise my brain when I'm relaxed and play a real person. Yes, I like to win. But I'm still learning how master my opening and all the variations. I have the idea that if you master one opening, you will eventually learn them all as the variations become more obscure and you have to experiment. I have no current interesting analyzing chess from a book right now. Kudos to those of you who do.
This is why I hate chess!
It makes me wonder if chess is even a thinkings man game.
It got more in common with those toy spiral games than with thinking games.