Anger is RUINING my Chess [Please Help]

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chessgm003

Hey everyone,

Sometimes I get extremely angry while playing chess which causes me to lose lot of games. Here are the things that happen when I'm in this state of mind:

 

1.) I move extremely fast even if I have a longer time control

2.) I don't think logically & just move, move, and move.

3.) I just want the game to finish ASAP

4.) This ultimately results in a loss or draw & increases the anger

5.) I'm usually angry at myself

6.) If my opponent is moving fast, I get angry and start moving fast too.

 

This "Angry state of mind" has caused me to lose countless games which I could have won if I were relaxed or calm. 

 

Am I the only one who is experiencing anger while playing chess? Have you ever experienced something like this? 

 

If so, how did you deal with it? How can I overcome this problem? 

 

Please help.

 

SteveDevastator
Stop worrying about winning. Remember to have fun. The more serious you are, the less creative you will be in chess. You will stick to ridged time controls and overthink basic moves. Im on a losing streak, they happen. Enjoy them and learn instead of punish yourself and dread the next one. Have fun and the calmness will follow
Piperose

The title on your thread should've read, "Anger is ruining my life"

The good thing here is that you've acknowledged it(point 5), and need help in your concluding paragraphs.

It's best if you address them person-to-person (s); counselors, 24 hour helplines, family, a close friend.

DrSpudnik

The problem presents itself when you play chess. You have a problem with anger. You do need to learn to control it in order to not bother everyone around you in other aspects of your life. Angry outbursts often come from feelings of powerlessness or victimization. Losing a chess game recreates a miniature set of these cues with no real harm attached. Do get some kind of help, in order to deal with whatever else makes you flip, before you do something in real life that you (or someone else) regrets.

DavidHHH

Are you often angry outside chess?

Kasimirov

"Anger is an energy" Johnny Lydon
Just turn it to your advantage. 

Arnie-Squashanegger

Jenot

Hmm... this sometimes happens to me when i'm playing Blitz (and i have lost 2 or 3 games). I know it's best (for me) to stop playing Blitz for a while (if i am in this state). This does not happen when i have a long time control. Moving fast when you have a lot of time is a mistake.

Why does it happen? (longer time control)

 

DrSpudnik
Justs99171 wrote:

This is fine. Don't listen to that guy telling you to just have fun. You should be angry in chess. You're trying to kill someone, right? Just fantasize that you're Joffry and your opponent is Ned Stark.

Anger clouds thought and will lead to bad moves. Only the board matters in chess.

The9thRank

Take your ego out of the game.  

chessgm003
kaynight wrote:

Give up chess.

 

Nope

chessgm003
AhPhoey wrote:

I just played the ChessGM003 - when I won, he got TICKED.  He told me I should hide my family because he's coming to get me.  

LOL

pawn8888

When a person loses he should celebrate because he made his opponent happy. It's a good trick to use to avoid anger.

lelouchesstar

It's bad to have feelings in the way of something you know u want to enjoy.

But at least you know that yourself as you put this to have a clue to solve it.

First thing first. 

you should look at the game outside from the board, meaning this kind of practice will always help you get better, with nothing to stop you from that unless you stop playing.

Learning is winning, a defeat in chess can always be turned into a win by studying the amazing moves your current opponent has done to make that game hard. getting to see that will help you not fall into it next time and who knows you may use it in a game too.

Don't try to keep others pace or state of mind make your own, remeber in chess is also tactics outside the board meaning that you can play relaxed and that can put pressure into the oponnent just like that and its a bonus.

if you play fast for any reason, always at least study the last 2-3 moves of your opponent and not only focus on your own see if those are connected in a spot, working together, yes this takes time but is something you have to do in the go to avoid mistakes for not caring about your opponent moves.
remember that chess is a 2 person game, if you get friends you can enjoy it with them always and learn from each other while getting better at it.
Study your games and enjoy watching others too.
As a person who enjoys chess I took my time to share those toughts, enjoy your game.

 

 

ANOK1

Put some music on       

Arnie-Squashanegger

aaaah! Johnny Rotten! he's the man!!

motherinlaw

Think up something light and amusing to say to the winner in the chat space.  Then enjoy your own cleverness -- a skill much more useful in life than being a chess expert.

 

Samples:   (1)"Btw, we Were playing "Giveaway Chess -- Right?"

                   (2) "Thanks for the game! I'd always wanted to know if I could still win a chess game if I gave away my queen early on.... now I have my answer:  "Apparently not."  

                  (3)  "I'm wondering now if I should give up chess and find a new hobby ... how hard do you think stamp collecting is?"

                  (4) "Looks like this win really raised your rating! -- hope it raises your spirits!    I was Actually Hoping to Lose, for Your sake ...........as far as you know...."

 

Note: as you can see, the comments you come up with do Not have to be especially "funny."

MickinMD
ak472g wrote:
Stop worrying about winning. Remember to have fun. The more serious you are, the less creative you will be in chess. You will stick to ridged time controls and overthink basic moves. Im on a losing streak, they happen. Enjoy them and learn instead of punish yourself and dread the next one. Have fun and the calmness will follow

Very well said!  You need to keep a certain edge and a certain level of determination and controlled aggression, but if it doesn't work or if you blunder, just tell yourself it's another thing you've learned not to do that will eventually improve your chess.

Arnie-Squashanegger

Anger channeled correctly can make you world champion, for angry players it's a waste of time having fun, too many chess.com members have fun losing and enjoy being a patzer, many a world champion was carved from anger.

tgy007

dont worry about it too much.