Could you stop playing chess forever if it turned out to be toxic for you?

This is me I'm addicted, but I also s u c k at this game best rapid like 1305. I don't know if I should just quit entirely? If you can't be even among the best or even expert level, should you waste your time? Just a thought.

1305 is way better than average. Yes, I could quit chess if it wasn't fun for me anymore and turned out to be hurting me. No, I wouldn't necessarily recommend that to you considering how your account is less than a month old. You are more likely just not familiar to the natural swings of rating and variance.

If rating and competition bring you down, then you could also consider unrated games, chess puzzles, going over Grandmaster games and other ways of improving your overall chess ability (and perhaps love for chess) without risking your rating, or exposing yourself to competition you don't like.

@1

"if I should just quit entirely?"
++ Chess is a game. It is meant to be fun. If it is no fun to you, then quit.

"If you can't be even among the best or even expert level, should you waste your time?"
++ That is a wrong question. People play soccer, tennis, golf, bridge, darts, snooker...
all for fun without becoming the best or expert level.
In any game there is only one best player and there is only a small minority of expert players.

I feel like I'm just on a high only to be crushed . loss elo, gain, loss, gain, loss, but never really getting anywhere. Is this not the definition of insanity?

@4

"never really getting anywhere"
++ Analyse your lost games and learn from your mistakes.
'He evidently has an extraordinary good memory,
for he always makes the same mistakes' - Steinitz

All try thanks. I do take your advice about blunder checking, before you move it helped.

If it's a question posed to us as well as to yourself, I'll answer it.

I'd like to become an expert, but I'm afraid it will never be possible, for some reason. However, since what mainly drives me to practice chess is the passion and interest in the game, in the end what matters to me is to enjoy every single game ; Satisfaction, I assure you, is always guaranteed.

No, even if I always stay at my current level, it won't be a waste of time. I spend as much time as I can on chess without taking it away from other things, and it's good for my mood.

i get epilepsy by praxi (reflex seizure induced by patterns) Chess is a big trigger, minecraft has been one in the past, and any game with black and white squares, also suduko and majohng.

So although I've reached 1800 on rapid, I'm going to eventually quit, I don't feel like risking my health anymore

Pay attention to how you feel when you play. If negative emotions dominate, it may be time to reassess your approach or take a break.