Do you enjoy playing chess?

I started on here about a year ago; played a lot as a teenager and was ok, and wanted to try and keep my brain ticking over now I'm in my 50s.  Thing is, I mainly play 5 minute games, because they are quite fun.  Longer games are far more interesting, but I remember now why I gave up playing years ago - it gets quite stressful, and gives me headaches!  So is that just me or do others fine chess quite stressful as well as engrossing?  Any ways of reducing the stress?

Don't play long games - at least not for now. I'm unsure as to how to advise a total stranger (or even someone I know) how to reduce stress. I suggest you start researching "stress reduction" by using a search engine and going to reliable sites such as webmd.com, mayoclinic.com etc. 

Is this strictly a chess-related problem? ie you don't usually get stressed out about other things as well?  If not you should consider getting a physical and making sure you don't already have high BP and/or any other physical symptoms caused by stress.

In the meantime maybe you could try moving up to 10 min games and keep on expanding your "horizon" for longer games and see at what pt they stop being fun. 

BTW IMHO It's not normal to get stressed out frequently over chess. I get pissed off once in awhile when I bungle a won game or lose on a stupid blunder, but usually I can shrug such setbacks off and just tell myself to be more careful in the future.

Thanks Nimzoroy; no I don't get too stressed by most things.  I think it's just concentrating hard that gives me headaches.  And yeah, I can shrug off losses provided I haven't done something stupid, or have lost to someone I know isn't very good.  I do sometimes get a bit of an adrenaline rush playing blitz games, and I'm not sure that's very healthy.  Computer gamers tell me they get the same thing.  On the other hand, occasionally I play games that make me laugh out loud when I or my opponent does something daft.  It's interesting though what can stress you out; I know that none of it matters really, but it seems to at the time!

I'm the complete opposite. Short games are the ones that stress me a little, because you have less time to think and less time to think means your more likely to make a bad blunder. Like the other day I was reviewing a game and noticed i had the option of capturing his queen with my knight but I didn't see it during the game! 

It's kind of a spiritual, Zen thing for me. You have to be OK with losing, knowing that you cannot win them all. Not even the greatest win them all. If you enjoy chess, enjoy chess. Let the chips fall where they may. Let your rating go wherever. Play opponents around your skill level. That's the beauty of a rating system.

If you want to be better, you will be most peaceful if you want to be better for the sake of getting better. But if you just want to win a lot, and if losing a game is stressful, then you need to let go of that fear of losing. The alternative is to play 12 year-olds who have just learned the basic rules. How boring would that be?

Paradoxically, it is when you are able to let go of the fear of losing, or the desire to win, and embrace the beauty of the game that you can really improve. And I'm speaking from my experiences as a classically trained musician. My chess game is not so good.

But I am enjoying chess, loving chess, and finding myself more at peace and ease with it as I continue to surrender to the fact that I'll lose. Of course, I don't like making dumb mistakes, and I do want to win. But I'm OK with losing. And I'd rather lose a well-played game than win one where my opponent comes out making blunder after blunder.

That's how I enjoy, to the best of my ability anyway.

I find longer games to be quite relaxing. Shorter games (i.e. Blitz, Lightning) get quite stressful because you have to worry about time and the game, while in longer games you can foret about managing the clock for a while.

I find short games a stressful cycle of silly mistakes and thrown away wins. My standard games are 15|10 and I thoroughly enjoy that time setting.

I'm now in my 50's also. I learned to play chess in school as a teenager, and I enjoyed it alot. But as the years have passed, other things have either gained or demanded my attention, and because there was little opportunity to play, chess was side-lined.

But a few years ago, I discovered I could play chess online! WOW! Opportunity now only depended upon access to a computer and a having a little time on my hands. I've played at a few different sites, but I really think this one is the best.

I play online chess almost exclusively. Because I play from my PC at home, sometimes other things here can demand my attention, as I'm a homeowner, have 2 jobs, I'm married, have 4 kids, several pets, etc. Online chess just gives me more flexibility with the clock than live chess. I also tend to think slowly and enjoy analysis, so I find online seems to suit me, too. And I win more often, LOL!

I'd suggest:

• online chess rather than live chess,
• becoming a premium member (so you have access to more resources),
• and playing games with a 3-day move limit. You can always move more often than that of course, but if other things need your attention, you won't feel so pressured.

It works for me! Hope that's helpful in some way.

I’m with guitarzan on this.  I’m in my 60s and have more or less stopped playing live chess. Even a 30-minute game seems to demand intense concentration, so now I play online or vote chess which I find much more relaxing.

Also there are quite a few eejits on live, but I don’t think I’ve ever encountered one in “online”.

Thanks for all the comments.  I particularly like the Zen thing.  I do still enjoy playing chess most of the time (of course I wouldn't be here otherwise) but it's interesting to think about these things.  And the eejits I can confirm; some needlessly unpleasant comments and so on that turn up from time to time.  And the ones who disconnect rather than resign and all that stuff.  Also I am a diamond member now, and like very much Tactics Trainer and Chess Mentor which I'd recommend to anyone.

I only enjoy it when I am winning or in a good winning position, lol...

  I think that goes for all of us really, though I can still admire someone who has outplayed me well or come up with a neat combination.  Sometimes.

I like your point Allgeier. I have been thinking along the same lines - i.e. playing for the love of the game. If I win, great, but if I lose, I'm thankful for the game and can learn something from it.

I can relate with you, Blitzjoker...used to play when I was younger and did ok, but I felt so stressed and feared losing. Now I'm trying to unlearn that habit.

It's stresfull/depressing when I put a lot of effort into a move and it's a bad move... but not 5 minute games.  They're fun because good or bad, all is forgiven in just a few minutes and you can start over :)

Concentrating gives you headaches?  With anything or just chess?  I'm not familiar with that.  After a tense tournament game I usually find I've been clenching my teeth without realizing it, chewing on my lip or something like that.  Maybe you're tensed up and it gives you a headache?

The psychology of playing games is quite odd, in that you need to take it seriously enough to try and win (or else you might as well do something useful like knitting) but not so seriously that it causes a lot of stress.  Thanks for your comment adam_wilkes, I think unlearning the habit is what I want to do, and probably will manage eventually.  Partly because the older I get, the more I realise most things don't matter so much.

Concentrating hard has always given me headaches, not sure though whether it's the actual thinking or the worry of getting things wrong.  Some people never get headaches, which must be nice.   In some ways I prefer playing rubber bridge, because you can always blame the cards then if you are useless.  Chess is ultimately a game of skill, and you can't blame anyone but yourself when you blunder.  That's why I find 5 minute games less stressful, because they have an element of blunder built into them.  Except for very good players of course.  I do marvel at people who play very high quality bullet games.

61 here, and I too am into the "Zen" aspect of online chess. I've been playing that almost exclusively--from a high of 12 simultaneously to 9 currently--and I love moving the pieces around in analysis mode and trying out different lines and combinations.

Live chess, usually 10 minute, is completely different, with its own stresses and rewards. It's over quickly, that's for sure, but it comes burdened with time pressure, stupid blunders, great combinations that you don't have time to play, etc.

I've gradually come to view the online games as my "real" chess and the blitz games as my "throwaway" chess. Those are fun for the moment, but I never delude myself into thinking that anything rides on them. They don't really help me improve a lot, and I've finally separated my ego from them. The old brain just doesn't work fast enough any more, and I'm OK with that.

As to the original question: "Do I enjoy chess?" Yes, emphatically yes. It's got so many levels and so many complexities that I know it can keep me fully occupied as a hobby for the remainder of my life. Hey, it's done well for the lat 40 years!

Frankly speaking, the only time I fail to enjoy a chess game is when it lasts more than 50 moves. After then, the game tends to be utterly boring since most of the pieces are probable to have left the board. Hence, a dull end game comes as mental depression to me and mot as the relaxing event some have mentioned before. When the board is crowded, complex, and promising of amazing lines, I cannot, for the life of me, help but love the game! Even a loss after a well-fought tactic-filled game can be seen lightly instead of a loss attributed to the failure of a pawn to move when the king comes personally to get it.

I was talking to my brother last night (a strong player; 2000+ in his day) and he agreed that he found playing chess stressful, because you had to think hard and thinking is difficult. He also opined that the stronger player you were, the more stressful it was as you had more to lose.  We also agreed that there was a small element of luck in chess ( a move made early in the came might cover a square much later on that turns out to be important for example).  Maybe that's another thread though.

Very much so.

With whole honesty, I really dislike this game.  There isn't anything else on this world that drives me as insane as this game.  If I lose, forget it, stress is understatement.  I also like short games because there is room for error, on both parties.  Slow game give too much time to cover all possible mistakes.  I am not best at this game, duh lol, but short games are more fun.  Long games are for serious chess players, imo.