Effectiveness of electroshock in improving chess game?

Would anyone be willing to contribute some data on the effectiveness of self electroshock in improving chess game?

My hypothesis is that pattern recognition will happen faster if tactical oversights or blunders are tied to a computer analysis and delivers electroshock when a player makes these moves. So a group of players under these conditions would improve faster than a group of players without the electroshock

also you can give yourself a "treat" when you play "best move"

Electroshock administered WHERE?  The brain?  The nads?  What precisely do you have in mind?

surely the testicles would be the ONLY option

Someday soon I will share with you an all too true story.