I admit I cheated close me down

Whenever I play correspondence I like to set up my boards and dress up one from my collection of mannequins in the clothing of my opponent.

Sometimes I have to guess as the avatar's photos are not always of them.  The mannequins usually need make up to take the edge off the glare from the lights. This ensures that they do not appear shiny on my video footage.

Anyways I digress.  I had just finshed quiffing the wig on my opponent and had reached over for the curling tongs to finish off when I inadvertently brushed the tip of my queen.  I finished the styling and then played my move - Bg7.

That evening I got not a wink of sleep but rather tossed and turned all night.  It was only in the morning as I awoke unrefreshed that I realised that I had not j'adoubed after touching my queen.  I was mortified.

I was a common cheat and throw myself unto the mercy of chess.com.  It was an honest mistake.  I am very sorry Gonnosuke.  Please forgive me.

Are the penalties less harsh for self-correcting malfeasance? 

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cheeze

um....

I think you should have to clean his clock as a penalty!

 It was a 3 day game no clock

How do you have touch move in correspondence?

btw I think theres a trophy called 'you cleaned my clock!'

And they say there is no sarcasm ;-(

Do you also use the mannequinns as voo-doo dolls? Or is it just me?

Exactly what is wrong with you?

are the mannequins moving the pieces as well?

It's not cheating. There was no foul. No need to J'adoube. Suppose this had been OTB, and suppose you had been quiffing the wig of your living breathing opponent. Would this be a foul? I daresay it would be. I daresay he'd be well within his rights to give you a hard push right back into your seat. But is it a foul to tidy up your mannikin's wig in correspondence chess? Of course not. Is it all right to be a very fat man clad in nought but a monocle while playing correspondence chess? Yes, my friend I can testify this is a fine way to play. OTB? No, not so much. Is any of this getting through? What about using a computer to move the pieces, surely that's cheating, you ask? (don't you?)... No, in cc, even that is okay, so long as the computer is not plugged in and you gently use a corner of the machine to the shove the piece across the board to the desired square. I hope this helps.

B719 said: That evening I got not a wink of sleep but rather tossed and turned all night.  It was only in the morning as I awoke unrefreshed that I realised that I had not j'adoubed after touching my queen.  I was mortified.

  Wouldn't you need to j'adoube before inadvertently brushing your queen?

 You are indeed a scholar of the rules.  I now feel doubly mortified.  There appears no other option than to resign in shame.

Just off to challenge achmatova before he leaves

Wait! Since you didn't touch the board ON THE SCREEN, you don't need resign! You didn't cheat!

Yes but I know that I touched it.  I have to live with myself.  If I left a skeleton like that in my closet it would grow and eat me up from the inside out leaving an empty sullen eyed husk.

I'm not prepared to take that risk.

xD

What is a mannequin?

 Like a shop dummy that they put clothes on in Bloomingdales.