The point of this is that here is one of my games before reading my system and learning this plan (even though I thought Nb5 looked strong I decided I couldn't justify the time lost.
What I am trying to show by this is that I didn't know the plan in this position at all, and was suffering just like you describe. With some experience and seeing some grandmaster games, and a little bit of research, I am actually confident that I would win this same position again given the chance, even against the same 2000 (but perhaps I'm over confident). But back then, I lost a miniature. Be patient, study GM games, and the plans will come.
To learn plans you just have to study various positions and master games, and read some good chess books that have lots of annotated games. You will pick up multiple plans that will help in your games.
Some noteable ones that I know are h5-h4 in the sozin, Kh8 Rg8 g5 in a hedgehog, Nb5 against the dutch stonewall (and taking on d5 when the e pawn cannot recapture, which is great for white), h6 g5 in the najdorf Bg5 line (to clear the e5 square), the b4-c5 pawn storm against a kings indian, the f5 f4- g5-h5-g4 etc pawn storm with a kings indian, the botvinnik system I think of the queens gambit exchange (f3 and eventually e4) and more. You just pick up plans from reviewing master games that are well annotated, and you can use them in many of your games, and with that experience the moves will come more naturally.
Here is a game I read in my system a few weeks ago, and just saw again as a puzzle today.