Introducing myself, advice appreciated!

Why thank you Bobby!! That is one of the nicest things anyone has said about me. 

to be sneered at by a troll; is the nicest thing a troll could ever do for considering all the attention they demand (IMHO)....

Run before it's too late.

Welcome.  I think your best bet is to not let things become to complicated.  There will be plenty of time for that later if you choose.  I think playing longer games is good advise.  I would add three things:

1) Play as many games for which you have the time and inclination.

2) Learn the most basic opening strategies.

     a) concentrate on the center

     b) develop your pieces (especially center pawns, knights, and bishops)

     c) try not to move the same piece twice without a good reason

     d) castle early

3) Learn the basic endgame checkmates (K and Q vs. K, K and R vs. K, etc.).  There's nothing worse than working very hard to obtain a winning game and ending up with a draw because you can't follow through.

Good luck!

Possibly of interest:
Simple Attacking Plans by Fred Wilson (2012)
https://web.archive.org/web/20140708090402/http://www.chesscafe.com/text/review874.pdf
https://www.newinchess.com/Shop/Images/Pdfs/7192.pdf
Logical Chess: Move by Move by Irving Chernev (1957)
https://web.archive.org/web/20140708104437/http://www.chesscafe.com/text/logichess.pdf
The Most Instructive Games of Chess Ever Played by Irving Chernev (1965)
https://chessbookreviews.wordpress.com/tag/most-instructive-games-of-chess-ever-played/
Winning Chess by Irving Chernev and Fred Reinfeld (1949)
https://web.archive.org/web/20140708093415/http://www.chesscafe.com/text/review919.pdf
Back to Basics: Tactics by Dan Heisman (2007)
https://web.archive.org/web/20140708233537/http://www.chesscafe.com/text/review585.pdf
Discovering Chess Openings by GM John Emms (2006)
https://web.archive.org/web/20140627114655/http://www.chesscafe.com/text/hansen91.pdf
Openings for Amateurs by Pete Tamburro (2014)
http://kenilworthian.blogspot.com/2014/05/review-of-pete-tamburros-openings-for.html
https://chessbookreviews.wordpress.com/tag/openings-for-amateurs/
https://www.mongoosepress.com/excerpts/OpeningsForAmateurs%20sample.pdf

Chess Endgames for Kids by Karsten Müller (2015)

https://chessbookreviews.wordpress.com/tag/chess-endgames-for-kids/
http://www.gambitbooks.com/pdfs/Chess_Endgames_for_Kids.pdf
A Guide to Chess Improvement by Dan Heisman (2010)
https://web.archive.org/web/20140708105628/http://www.chesscafe.com/text/review781.pdf

Seirawan stuff

http://seagaard.dk/review/eng/bo_beginner/ev_winning_chess.asp?KATID=BO&ID=BO-Beginner
https://www.chess.com/article/view/book-review-winning-chess-endings
https://web.archive.org/web/20140627132508/http://www.chesscafe.com/text/hansen173.pdf
http://www.nystar.com/tamarkin/review1.htm

I find "1001 Chess Sacrifices and Combinations" and "1001 Brilliant Ways To Checkmate" by Fred Reinfeld both useful and entertaining. Try Amazon.com or Alibris.com for copies.

Good luck!