Fools mate.
maybe fastest check mate
1. e4 e5
2. f4 na6 (hah!)
3. f4xe5 (yes! center board...) Qh4+ (wait, what?)
4. g3 Qxe4+ (wait a second...I don't like this...)
5. Be2 Qxh1 (quit!)
After a couple of frustration-inducing openings like this one, I decided to stop King's Gambit. I'm back to my English. If not for a few blunders per (middle) game, my English opening (could have been) a respectable 8 out 10.
(I lowered my expectations since I started playing chess regularly a few days ago. I'm no longer interested in winning per se, as much as I am interested in not making any blunders per game.)
[Site "Chess.com iPhone"]
[Date "03/20/2016 08:51PM"]
[White "White (0)"]
[Black "Black (0)"]
1.f3 e6 2.g4 Qh4#
2 move check mate for black