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Most Bizarre Behavior Over The Board?

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Avatar of electricpawn
electricpawn
Feb 22, 2010
0
#21
padman wrote:

One time at a tournament there was a problem with the pairing system so the computer said that I was playing in the first round against 5 other people.

They all stacked on top of each other in the same chair and became fused. I applied a varnish and sold that totem pole on ebay for $215.00.

The cost of the varnish was $10 so the profit margin was quite good.

 This story is not true! That quantity of varnish would cost at least $15!

Avatar of Accidental_Mayhem
Accidental_Mayhem
Feb 22, 2010
0
#22
Loomis wrote:

Waving someone's hand away and saying there is no such thing as luck is kind of rude. Shaking hands is a traditional sign of respect before the starts and is actually part of the international rules.

I do find the phrase "good luck" to be somewhat strange. Does anybody here actually wish good luck for their opponent? I always say "good game" instead of "good luck".

 For this very reason, I have gotten into the habit of saying either "Play well" or "Have a good game" when I offer to shake the hand of my opponent.  There are those who refuse to acknowledge even this, so don't be surprised by this slight.  It helps to remember that manners don't count OTB, and there is no "rule" to ban bad behaviour.  After all, you can't legislate morality, decency, or common sense so if someone is deficient in one or all of these traits don't take it personal.  It's them, no you.

Brian

Avatar of electricpawn
electricpawn
Feb 22, 2010
0
#23

A number of years ago I played a tournament game against guy who was 88 years old. I was in my early 20's at the time. As we played, he would nod of to sleep every couple moves. I wasn't sure if I should wake him up after my move, but he was never in time trouble.

His napping didn't bother me, but he was a fairly strong player and beat me. I wasn't angry, but trust me; when you get beaten by a napping octogenarian your ego is bruised.

This was the last round of the day, and I hung around to chit chat with the tournament director who was a friend of mine. The 88 year old guy was sitting near the entrance of the building, and apparently his ride never showed up. He shuffled over and asked if I could give him a ride home. 

Now, when i say this guy was 88, I'm not sure I'm conveying how old he looked - especially to a punk in his 20's. He was not a young 88. He looked like George Burns'  father.

I felt bad for the guy, and we couldn't leave him at the restaurant where the tournament was held, so I agreed. His house was about a thirty minute drive and, being a young punk, I drove him home as fast as I could for fear he would die in my car.

Avatar of DragoniteTWG
DragoniteTWG
Feb 22, 2010
0
#24

the clock thrower went beserk

Avatar of orangehonda
orangehonda
Feb 22, 2010
0
#25
zxb995511 wrote:

I have no personal experiences to share but I suppose a friend's is good enough as a thanks to be able to read all yours. My friend is a former chess NM the story on how he lost his title and was banned from the USCF is as follows: He was once in an open tournament and the top seeds at the tourney were 4 NM's including himself and 1 WGM and 1 GM. Everyone wanted the oportunity to play the GM who was the highest rated person there but it was a knockout tournament and he was paired in the pre second-to-last round with the WGM, who was admitedly stronger than he was. HE REALLY wantd a chance to play the GM so in order to win he attempted some psycilogical tactics. In the game against the WGM he did not look at the board at all! He simply played while looking off into the distance as if he was bored. He would get up alot and look around, yawn and fake he was sleeping. After a while the tactics seemed to be taking their effect and the WGM in addition to looking highly annoyed had a worse position. My friend kept the "detatched" attitude and at one point the WGM got so annoyed she asked him what his problem was. He in his childish attitude responded "I don't need to use my brain to beat a woman so just make your move or resign already" and that comment was the straw that broke the cammel's back, he was not known to be a good sportsman and already had quite a few misdeameaners on record in the USCF. So that comment cost him the tournament his title and he was banned from the USCF forever.     

 !!  I didn't know unsporting behavior like that could get a title taken away and banned forever, wow.  I guess he had a few misdemeanors on his record like you said... and he was incredibly rude... but this surprised me, it's still just all talk and without shouting or profanity even.

Surely he has some more stories then, like maybe to resign he overturned a whole table, or maybe wrote something inappropriate on a pairing sheet while forging another players signature... lol

One of the stories the blind guy told me was that the reason one of his knights was missing an ear was he once beat an FM who resigned by throwing his board on the ground and so was kicked out of the tournament.

Avatar of orangehonda
orangehonda
Feb 22, 2010
0
#26
ndchessnut wrote:
Loomis wrote:

Waving someone's hand away and saying there is no such thing as luck is kind of rude. Shaking hands is a traditional sign of respect before the starts and is actually part of the international rules.

I do find the phrase "good luck" to be somewhat strange. Does anybody here actually wish good luck for their opponent? I always say "good game" instead of "good luck".

 For this very reason, I have gotten into the habit of saying either "Play well" or "Have a good game" when I offer to shake the hand of my opponent.  There are those who refuse to acknowledge even this, so don't be surprised by this slight.  It helps to remember that manners don't count OTB, and there is no "rule" to ban bad behaviour.  After all, you can't legislate morality, decency, or common sense so if someone is deficient in one or all of these traits don't take it personal.  It's them, no you.

Brian

I feel awkward saying "good luck" because it sounds like I think I'm going to win and I don't want luck to have anything to do with it anyway.  I usually just look them in the eye and shake hands and make some barely audible sound, half the time it seems like my opponent and I don't say anything, just shake hands.  If they say good luck, good game, or play well I'll say thanks, and repeat whatever they said heh.

Avatar of zxb995511
zxb995511
Feb 22, 2010
0
#27
orangehonda wrote:
zxb995511 wrote:

I have no personal experiences to share but I suppose a friend's is good enough as a thanks to be able to read all yours. My friend is a former chess NM the story on how he lost his title and was banned from the USCF is as follows: He was once in an open tournament and the top seeds at the tourney were 4 NM's including himself and 1 WGM and 1 GM. Everyone wanted the oportunity to play the GM who was the highest rated person there but it was a knockout tournament and he was paired in the pre second-to-last round with the WGM, who was admitedly stronger than he was. HE REALLY wantd a chance to play the GM so in order to win he attempted some psycilogical tactics. In the game against the WGM he did not look at the board at all! He simply played while looking off into the distance as if he was bored. He would get up alot and look around, yawn and fake he was sleeping. After a while the tactics seemed to be taking their effect and the WGM in addition to looking highly annoyed had a worse position. My friend kept the "detatched" attitude and at one point the WGM got so annoyed she asked him what his problem was. He in his childish attitude responded "I don't need to use my brain to beat a woman so just make your move or resign already" and that comment was the straw that broke the cammel's back, he was not known to be a good sportsman and already had quite a few misdeameaners on record in the USCF. So that comment cost him the tournament his title and he was banned from the USCF forever.     

 !!  I didn't know unsporting behavior like that could get a title taken away and banned forever, wow.  I guess he had a few misdemeanors on his record like you said... and he was incredibly rude... but this surprised me, it's still just all talk and without shouting or profanity even.

Surely he has some more stories then, like maybe to resign he overturned a whole table, or maybe wrote something inappropriate on a pairing sheet while forging another players signature... lol

One of the stories the blind guy told me was that the reason one of his knights was missing an ear was he once beat an FM who resigned by throwing his board on the ground and so was kicked out of the tournament.

 He told me a few more stories of what some of those other misdeamenors were but they are a bit longer than this one but I suppose I could post another if you would like?

Avatar of Conquistador
Conquistador
Feb 22, 2010
0
#28

I once played against this guy who wore sunglasses like we were playing poker.  I do not get unnerved by most of these attempts because I focus very hard on the board.  I eventually beat him fairly badly and took off his sunglasses to resign.

Avatar of orangehonda
orangehonda
Feb 22, 2010
0
#29
zxb995511 wrote:
He told me a few more stories of what some of those other misdeamenors were but they are a bit longer than this one but I suppose I could post another if you would like?

 Sure, I'd like to hear some more Smile

Avatar of Conquistador
Conquistador
Feb 22, 2010
0
#30

I once played two players from the same family in my first tournament in back-to-back rounds.  Their father was also their coach.  My mother was speaing to him before the round started and he asked who was my coach.  My mother replied I did not have one and he gave us this weird look and laughed saying, "how do you expect to become good?" 

I played the first game and it came down to a draw.  The next game I smashed his daughter in seven moves.

Afterwards, he came to look at her scoresheet with confidence I might add.  The look on his face was priceless and I watched his shoulders drop. 

He avoided my mother and I for the rest of the tournament.

Avatar of Conquistador
Conquistador
Feb 22, 2010
0
#31

I once was at a tournament and the person who founded the tournament came in and played a few games.  I was surprised to see him play at his advanced age, he looked like Montgomery Burns from the Simpsons and he could barely walk.  His wife later brought in Bachlava which was delicious.  I later found out he was cellebrating his 104th birthday which was on the same day as mine.

Avatar of Torctimes
Torctimes
Feb 22, 2010
0
#32

A fairly highly rated player told me he recently played in a tournament where his opponent would make his move and then stand directly behind him while he was contemplating his own move. Rather bizarre but apparently legal.

Avatar of Seriosity
Seriosity
Feb 22, 2010
0
#33

The worst I have experienced is a guy that listened to his music too loudly. Sometimes I could clearly hear the words, and if it was a song I knew, it would tend to distract me a little. No biggie :D

Avatar of Conquistador
Conquistador
Feb 22, 2010
0
#34

I think the best I can offer is my own bizarre behavior. 

I once played this guy who was known to dress up in rediculous outfits and hats.  He came in the one day dressed up as the Mafia.  The day I played him he was wearing a suit with a mad bomber hat.

Long story short, I was inspired by this and decided to make my own image.  I decided to bring in a green boat cushion with my chess set to every game since in tournaments. 

Then the legend began which would later be known as the Boat-Cushion Man.

Avatar of Conquistador
Conquistador
Feb 22, 2010
0
#35

I once went to a tournament that ran out of chairs, but had an adequate number of tables so a few of us had to stand the first round until they could bring in more chairs.

Avatar of Zugzeit
Zugzeit
Feb 22, 2010
0
#36

Yes a bit weird :)

Avatar of orangehonda
orangehonda
Feb 22, 2010
0
#37
tngerb wrote:
Torctimes wrote:

A fairly highly rated player told me he recently played in a tournament where his opponent would make his move and then stand directly behind him while he was contemplating his own move. Rather bizarre but apparently legal.

If I had to play a guy like that a would do EVERY underhanded thing I could think of to annoy the piss out of him... Mumbling insults, humming only loud enough for him, coughing, shaking the table a bit, I'd take a chair and put it right beside him and just stare at him so he could see me. That's a guy I'd want to get in a fight with... standing behind you like that is a very unethical psychological trick.

Alexy777, listening to music too loudly is against the rules. You could've complained about that...

 Some people say it helps them see other possibilities / opponent's ideas by looking at the board from the other side and will do so often in analysis.  As long as they're not leaning over you or making any noise I don't see the problem.

Avatar of zxb995511
zxb995511
Feb 22, 2010
0
#38
orangehonda wrote:
zxb995511 wrote:
He told me a few more stories of what some of those other misdeamenors were but they are a bit longer than this one but I suppose I could post another if you would like?

 Sure, I'd like to hear some more

 This one is very old. So my friend, as you know, is a jerk. The man learned that chess is as much psycology as it is tactics or calculation. So he went about winning a local tournament in a very underhanded manner. The tornament (perhaps some 20 years ago) was at a local chess club and there were only two titled players in it. He and some other NM (he hinted this other NM is no longer an NM, I think he might have reached GM) were the two top seeds, so in general the tournament was going to, in escence, go down to one of the two titled players. So this is where my friend got a brilliant idea. Both of the girlfriends of these guys attended the same highschool and were aparently aquaintances. So my friend instructed his girlfriend to get some dirt on his opponent, so a week before the tornament the two girls began to hang out and talk alot. After a week of "bonding" there was no information to be obtained no black eye to poke, and no wound to smother in salt and vinegar- So the day of the tournament came and he had nothing on the guy. So the tournament began and game for game they were tied. They were going to begin the last game of the tournament to decide who took home the amazing $250 first prize. 30 minutes before the game as they ate and spoke my friend came up with a very good and unsportsman like idea, he asked his girlfriend if both she and the other NM's girl were in the volleyball team and she answered yes. So he asked if she had at least seen the other girl in the changing room and sure enough they always talked after practice, so he asked if there was any distict mark on the other girl's body to which she said she recalled a mole of some sort on her left butcheek. With this information my friend went into the final round, and after a few moves my friend told his opponent "Hey man I have been having sex with your girl". The NM responded "sure and pigs can fly" to which my friend retorted "I like that mole she has on her left butcheek'' . The man stared up from the board and in my friends words "I had never seen a man get eyes that blood shot" he tried to play a few more moves but his state of mind failed him. He resigned shortly after and my friend won the tournament. A few weeks later the truth came to surface somehow and my friend was on suspension for a while and he could not register in any USCF tornaments for "extremely unsportsman like behaviour". So that went into his record and eventually led up to the event I posted earlier. 

Avatar of Kernicterus
Kernicterus
Feb 22, 2010
0
#39

These stories are so outrageous.  Does chess attract the weirdos? 

Most of the behavior would probably make me laugh...esp. wheezing and rudeness. I think knocking over boards or other violent outbursts should get them banned for a year.  I'd be afraid to laugh and get attacked. 

Avatar of orangehonda
orangehonda
Feb 22, 2010
0
#40
zxb995511 wrote:
orangehonda wrote:
zxb995511 wrote:
He told me a few more stories of what some of those other misdeamenors were but they are a bit longer than this one but I suppose I could post another if you would like?

 Sure, I'd like to hear some more

 This one is very old. So my friend, as you know, is a jerk. The man learned that chess is as much psycology as it is tactics or calculation. So he went about winning a local tournament in a very underhanded manner. The tornament (perhaps some 20 years ago) was at a local chess club and there were only two titled players in it. He and some other NM (he hinted this other NM is no longer an NM, I think he might have reached GM) were the two top seeds, so in general the tournament was going to, in escence, go down to one of the two titled players. So this is where my friend got a brilliant idea. Both of the girlfriends of these guys attended the same highschool and were aparently aquaintances. So my friend instructed his girlfriend to get some dirt on his opponent, so a week before the tornament the two girls began to hang out and talk alot. After a week of "bonding" there was no information to be obtained no black eye to poke, and no wound to smother in salt and vinegar- So the day of the tournament came and he had nothing on the guy. So the tournament began and game for game they were tied. They were going to begin the last game of the tournament to decide who took home the amazing $250 first prize. 30 minutes before the game as they ate and spoke my friend came up with a very good and unsportsman like idea, he asked his girlfriend if both she and the other NM's girl were in the volleyball team and she answered yes. So he asked if she had at least seen the other girl in the changing room and sure enough they always talked after practice, so he asked if there was any distict mark on the other girl's body to which she said she recalled a mole of some sort on her left butcheek. With this information my friend went into the final round, and after a few moves my friend told his opponent "Hey man I have been having sex with your girl". The NM responded "sure and pigs can fly" to which my friend retorted "I like that mole she has on her left butcheek'' . The man stared up from the board and in my friends words "I had never seen a man get eyes that blood shot" he tried to play a few more moves but his state of mind failed him. He resigned shortly after and my friend won the tournament. A few weeks later the truth came to surface somehow and my friend was on suspension for a while and he could not register in any USCF tornaments for "extremely unsportsman like behaviour". So that went into his record and eventually led up to the event I posted earlier. 

lol!  That's pretty clever LaughingLaughing  I could imagine it backfiring though, after the guy jumps over the table and beats you with his chair lol.

I didn't realize the USCF kept a records like this -- I'm glad I've been good Tongue out