My story

The mission in chess is so simple that even a child understands intuitevely: Get in contact with enemy pieces/threaten enemy pieces in enemy terretory and nice things will start to happen. Of course you can`t get in direct contact with the enemy King(unless you mate him) so there instead of "contact with enemy piece" it`s "threaten mate".

My fide is 1820. When I played blitz and rapid I was doing what is required (to penetrate into enemy terretory, to get in direct contact) intuitevely, it`s as if I was playing with emotion, with some kind of aggression that was leading me toward the mission. Now comes the problem.. When I played long chess I was asking "why" about  e v e r y t h i n g, about every possible move. I could not choose a move unless I knew EXACTLY why that move and not the other. Due to that my long chess was rather slow and got only slower and slower the more new concepts I learned. And less enjoyable to play day by day. I was learnning every day from analysing. Eventually I stopped playing at all for many month and was just learning more and more waiting for the moment I get that "final piece" that i lack to have control when I play long chess. Of course in blitz and rapid I had no time to ask "why".

 I mean..  what the hell do you call this? Anyone who had a similar problem? I don`t have it anymore I realized this an hour ago.

Every brain is a different world. . .

 Think it`s not a matter of brain but of ignorance, or let`s say...light mindness. I am too deep probably. Some kind of control-freak.