QUITTING

Hard to know what to say. I notice your account is about 2 years old and you've played almost zero games.

When I was new I improved very slowly. I think 100 rating points in a year was the most I gained. But I played blitz every day (which I don't recommend, just saying).

In the beginning the most important thing to do is play, not study and analyze and do lessons, watch videos, etc. 

If it's the only time control you play it builds bad analysis habits.

But if you play blitz every day while also going to tournaments regularly, and studying, then it's probably not so bad. Some very strong young players, who improve quickly, play a lot of blitz (although other strong young players who improve quickly don't).

Although I see you play 10 minute blitz. When I was new I played 3 minutes. 10 is better than 3

Yes, it's better to play some rapid games too.

that's an awful lot of investment to just throw it out the window. do you love tge game? playing? then keep playing. only those with a real love for the game get so bothered by losses. learn from your losses and move on. 

or get your tattoos covered up and never play again. lololol don't do that 

Think of Chess like any other sport or activity.  There can be someone who naturally sucks at basketball (isn't athletic, has poor coordination, etc.) They can practice every day of their life, and they'll certainly get better, but then someone who is a natural at the sport can practice for a few months and beat the person without the natural talent for it. 

It can be frustrating, I know, but that's just the way it is.  I have played prodigy children in tournaments who ended up beating me and I have literally been playing chess longer than they've been alive. 

Chess gets better when you remove all expectations and play for fun.  There is always going to be someone better than you. Someone studying every variation of every opening and committing hours daily to it. At that point it becomes a chore... to me at least.

May I make a suggestion... Read a book entitled "The Talent Code". To learn chess, you need to do things that reinforce what you study. In the book, he talks about "Deep Learning". You are probably going through study materials too fast and need to slow it down. Study one thing at a time. Try to figure out the positions for a while before looking at the answers. If you are told the answer, you are more likely to forget it again soon. If you figure it out on your own, you reinforce the memory. Take frequent breaks. Go back over the stuff you just learned. Analyze it and replay it in your head. I would suggest learning mating patterns. There are tons of them. You can find them in the Attacking Lessons on chess.com. Don't just go over them once... but many times. If you figure it out on your own the first time, move on to the next one. If you needed a hint, replay it a few times. Look at the position and figure out where the weaknesses are and where the strengths are to better understand how the mating pattern exploits these weaknesses. Then I would move onto tactics. Playing slower time increments allows you to spend more time on a position and try to find the best moves. Blitz doesn't really help you learn. It's tests what you already know. But slower time controls allow you to spend time really understanding the position.

Start playing, stop studying. Do tactics.