Really dirty tricks and tips for the rude player

How about something my friend used to do to annoy me,

• when ever I tried to think up a good move she would bounce around going "yes, yes it's working!"
• She would stare at me and just as I would take a piece she'd say "Your actions hurt me, and I have mental issues"

I play a lot of kids at a juvenile detention center.  Here are some quality items they've begun to use as a means of distracting me:

1. Pick up no less than 5 pieces each move and place them in possible locations but DO NOT take your finger off... because taking your finger off means the move sticks.

2. Fart.

3. In the middle of the game, announce that it's time for your Seroquel.

4. Fart again.

5. Have the other residents begin making requests about every 1.33 minutes in frequency.  These requests should involve medication, using the bathroom to 'drop a deuce,' or changing underwear due to the unservicability of the current pair.

Start eating your pieces then eat his pieces, then started start eating yourself

TonightOnly:Just ask for her number, but get out your cell phone first (because that's what you'd type it into right?) and call it if it's fake call her a lieing bitch, really loudly.  Honestly girls if you don't want to give a guy your number don't, but also don't give him a fake one, just tell him to get lost. I'm sorry one of my girlfriends does this sometimes I find it weak.

someone may have said this already, but when my opponent is in time trouble I'll make my move and right before I take my hand off I'll say something like"Oh wait crap" and act like I just made a blunder, so my opponent will waste time trying figure out why I was upset with my move, even though the move was completely sound.

alison27 wrote:

Honestly girls if you don't want to give a guy your number don't, but also don't give him a fake one, just tell him to get lost. I'm sorry one of my girlfriends does this sometimes I find it weak.

Thank you! Really, no guy wants you to do this. I guarantee it. One of my friends made the argument that they will feel foolish when they are all by themselves, instead of feeling foolish in front of people. Well, we are not a bunch of babies; especially not the ones with enough nuts to ask out a stranger. It will only get our hopes up first, which will make us feel more foolish in the end.

But still--How does one "cheat" at chess on-line when it is impossible to move the piece(s) incorrectly and both opponents are just playing in silence (the best way I think)???

The problems with this is that, if you are polite and play your best, and you face a very strong opponent, maybe after the game they will show you where you made your mistakes, and give you pointers, and try to help you improve. But, if you are rude and annoying, the strong opponent won't want to talk to you, or play against you ever again.

edit:

Oops, it looks like you were just joking.

*coughs

*sounds of crickets

er...well, if you wanted to be really annoying, you could just 'accidentally' knock the board over, when it looks like you are losing... yeah... that would be funny.

How about the old: call ur girlfriend (or any girl will do) have her come over and show some good ol fashion public affection right in front of your opponent.

Move the board or the table where are you playing in order to throw the whole pieces.. (just when you are going to lose..)

When their hand moves towards a peice, mutter yes! and fist pump.

 LOL! That would do it for me.

lol this thread is great

I hate stallers too, people these days play for rating points.