roadblock

just getting lucky to win today - seems some days luck has a big part of this game 

Luck does play a part in short-term ratings, but I do see definite improvement. Remember when you were stuck at 100 for weeks? 

yes weeks and weeks  and months - so i really don't quite see what iam doing different than before - to warrant me going over 250 and on to 300 so luck must be playing major component in the mix and while i do recognize that i am seeing the board a more closely now -  maybe the combo of the two things comes to bear  

It's probably just that - seeing the board - that's responsible for the rating increase. You've just got to get that down, see when they drop a piece, before worrying about anything else. 

well what ever i said before was !@#$%hit

i lost three games in row again to lesser players which i had i know i should have won by move 25/30 but because i !@#$%^&uck-up blunders again. i lost 

sometimes i really hate this game -- its no fun -- maybe this  afternoon i will do better ---i better do  better -- i am not going under 300 -- maybe i used up my bad luck quotient- and in turn into the lucky game pattern is around the corner   course most times iam just full of !@#$hit so my ramblings  are just that  

see you in the afternnon

yesterday didn't go as bad asi thought - at least i stayed over 300 but just barely i lost all my poker games late last night  down now a few dollars-- so i am hoping i used up all my bad karma there  and maybe i can get back it (the good kind ) here --off to the tables 

well this session went really really badly now way under 300 -- four losses in a row - to lesser players - that blunder all the time but not as much as me -- can't seem to stop making a bad set of moves around the 20 moves part -- -- !@#$%^uck i am really starting to hate this game  but then i always say that when i am having a bad day ----poker is down --chess is down - my small ebay business is way down and with ebay punishing you on everything you do - its now costing me money just to stay in the game - my wife is increasing the honey due list daily- trying to not to give me time to play chess- and to top if off -- my best friend of 48 years- is pulling a "The Banshees of Inisherin:" type thing on me  and isn't speaking to me - cause i bore him now --

i think today i will take a few more meds just to make afternoon nap longer and deal less with today as a event-- maybe i start a new chess book i got  "chess fundamentals by jose capablanca  though just roughing through it -- it looks quite confusing for an old dog - but i will give a whirl - 

i also will add a few  words to another short  youth story i am writing but i think i have written to much its over 30000 words already --  but i find it makes the dark part of the days go away.

off till this afternoon -- maybe? -- need to get up for that  

Haven't posted in a while, so what do I find ???  The Dokester got to 300!!!!!!!!!!! My man!  

Knew you could do it. Gonna have a drink in your honor tonight! 

iam falling into the deep hole  of losers again below 250 been reading the book i bought but very confusing to follow except about the four centres being most important - loved your poem i guess?- will try another couple of games before off to the hospital for tests again -- got to slow down and not let my temper rule again 

falling further and further behind now below 240-- enough for this afternoon maybe tonight will be better 

more slippage this morning down to 228  must find the reason i am slipping so badly 

another seesion of sliding downwards 213 now - i guess my getting to 330 ans eveb once at 350 was just a fluke -- or lucky -- seems  i am just playing over my skill level or smarts  back to the basement i go till i level off -----so depressing -- but reality check -- you only get as far as luck will take you-- you have to have the skill to stay there  

ps this book i bought about chess -- just so confusing that its a waste of time to finish  

yes i think some books might be helpful just can't find right one

down down even more  soon out of the 200's 

today is a new day Saturday morning -- going to win back some games i hope and going to use up all my time on each game  to make better decisions  i hope -- 

 this blog is not for you its for me -its my therapy is use to control my self  from harm venting so i don't take it out on others -- so if you don't like it i didn't ask you too read it  and i spend more time then you playing on this site -- its not the time you put in its the skill which you acquire -- and i admit i not very good at that --

sat's  mornings sessions went badly again  now less than 175 time to stop for the morning or even the day  before i quit and move back to poker for good 

second coffee just made -- maybe i will read something for a while  naw i play two more games with new strat.-- just to see then quit 175-150 doesn't make much difference now 

well thats it for me -- bye to all that tryed to help -- back to poker full time again --

Well maybe you should feel guilty, you basically insulted him!