Things some chess players say when they blunder

i always say you played so bad i couldnt take any of your moves serious and thats why i blundered.

Actually i was just joking, somehow i feel im always playing much stronger players that give me chances

 I was distracted by your inability to write English competently!

Good game...fancy a rematch, for lets say, 10 dollars?

I dare you to take it...you know you want to...

Are we playing touch move?

What are you doing?! You can't move twice in a row!

Could you please hurry, I'm late for an appointment...(translation: dont take the piece, I hate disappointment)

so what should i cry a river now or stop speaking?

I could have trounced you easily in that middlegame. But I know how fragile you are! And I didn't want to burden my conscience with the guilt of crushing you.

that may look like a blunder, but i've calculated 20 moves ahead.

*Akward laugh* hehehe... hehe.. he.

I didn't see this classic from the Fischer vs. Spassky match:  "IT'S THE CAMERAS!!!!!!" -Fischer, well, sort of.

Another one might be the Soviets insisiting that Fischer had something in his chair, but I don't think that was Spassky's idea.

Or what about Kortchnoi saying the Soviets were passing Karpov secret messages in his yogurt? That was classic!

Lol just found this one on Wikipedia

1957, (Botvinik) lost to Smyslov by 9½–12½ in Moscow,^[43] but the rules then in force allowed him a rematch without having to go through the Candidates' Tournament, and in 1958 he won the rematch in Moscow;^[44]Smyslov said his health was poor during the return match.

See?? Even Grandmasters do it!

I was stoned

I was drunk and distracted

D'oh!!

When I make a blunder I admit it and resign, if needed. It happens to me often when I think of my super beautiful girlfriend and can not help to make mistakes. Follow my advice, chess players of the world: accept your mistakes and you will be at least 1/2 as happy as I am.

Regards,

Herrodri

its from a lesliee neelsen movie

I was trying out something new 

I wanted to see if you were paying attention 

I misclicked 

I touched the piece by mistake so I had to move it

I would never make that move if I wasn't so low on time

That bishop was on the dark square!

You didn't beat me, I beat myself

I haven't eaten anything all day...I can't concentrate when I'm hungry

You know what they say, "________" (Insert irrelevant quote about the best man not always winning here)

I have a habit of playing down to my competition

Houdini said it was a good move!

I usually say, 'Oops, missed that.'

LMAO

I just do my best to keep a poker face look and hope that my opponent doesn't see it. Hahahaha.