What it's really like being a female chess player.

nice T-Rex

Radiovitch wrote:

saying ''some men in chess world arw more women than some women'' is because they can get angry for a nothing, I didn't mean to be sexist but this stereotype is kinda true, not totally but it happens often... I have just to look at my mom, my ex girlfriends or some of my chess club players.

Have you considered that they're not getting mad over nothing? Maybe you're just incapable of understanding why they're angry. If you want to put your faith in gender stereotypes then you I guess you also believe that all men are bad at listening. And it's kinda hard to understand why someone is upset if you're unable to listen.

I didn't get it - and I'm a Scientologist...

Batgirl in #299 is generous in that she(?) depicts an enlightened society in which girls and women can join chess clubs and other clubs without fear of harassment and sexism.  I would say her observations are probably also mostly realistic and accurate.  Yes, there are many exceptions but the trend is in the right direction.  How could it not be?  Even though much more male talent is surfacing at young age than female talent for the same reasons that has been a phenomenon for centuries: chess is considered a male domain.  Well, it is.  But just because of human nature and the culture of most societies.   In groups where good competition is encouraged, it is difficult to suppress or intimidate players with talent even when it is unexpected.   You can say that about most chess clubs these days.

Oh, that :-) 

Just disable the d*mn chat!

You could avoid them all easily 

In your neck of the woods, sure.

Unfortunately loads of countries are not even where you were 50 years ago.

Though some are similar, every society is unique. Of course, I speak of the society in which I live and those similar.

Isn't playing golf a bit like club-bing?

Bats...  why?

Gobadod point...

Was it that necessary?

I agree that some men use their testosterone driven minds as a "bs excuse" to say vulgar things, but I do not think that being hit on by some inappropriate-chess-playing male or female means I am being objectified as a woman. It is annoying to say the least, but I also get "hit on" by some lesbian chess players too. Although chess.com is not the platform for use as an online dating tool, you are taking your own chances by utilizing anything that is related to online social media. If you want an environment where you are guaranteed to have only intellectual conversation, no vulgarities, and complete loss of sexual tendencies then you must choose games from only those you know or over an actual board in your own home.  **Side note...like I said in my original comment it is always necessary to tell the offender that you do not appreciate their demeanor or verbage...they should never feel as if they are getting away with disrespecting you, but if they become a bother...Disable chat and make sure to checkmate their butt with a smile on your face. **Grinning**

This is what it's really like being a female in a male-dominated community: https://youtu.be/G9AUlHsMlHE?t=1m14s

My eyes just rolled so hard I'm blind now. I'm gonna sue you for all your chess monies.

You'd better sue me for my other monies.

I think I should add more "verys", because sexism is so prevelant in the world that you can never have too many. Do you like reading about history? Well then get ready for sexism. Do you like to watch movies? Then get ready for sexism. Are you in the sevice industry? Well sexism is part of the job. Do you read magazines, articles on the Internet, politics, economy, education, academics, sports? Sexism is everywhere. Do you read about other countries besides your own? Are you religious? Sexism is is a worldwide thoughtwide historical tradition. In language, communication, the arts, it's everywhere. Personal experience and accute empathy will always give you a seven course meal of sexism. So, sometimes I scream...

Indeed. There was a time, when Aol was at the beginning of social media, that there were chats that were categorized into many congenial conversations. Obviously 20 yrs later, the situation has devolved somewhat. Where it seems playful flirtation, sexual innuendo has been taken to a different level. I never imagined a time when I have commented on soo many forums where women have been treated badly just for being a female chess player. Or that they're "stupid" or wired differently. Or why O why aren't there many high level female players.

I'd posted a statement in a similar thread, that I often felt men generally regurgitated these sentiments simply because they want more female interaction on a site mainly dominated by men. Although when a woman initiates such laments, I guess I naturally become skeptical. Especially if it's from someone I've never seen in the forums.

I'm like, "when is she going to reply to the many queries, advice, or engage in a real conversation?"

Yeah I agree with this whole comment. This is generally how I imagined the "first world sexism" -- bad, but not hideously so. I just observe men and women working together everywhere I go, and while, yes, there is probably stuff going on behind the scenes, we just seem very, very far from the extreme times of the past, and that has had a very positive impact on women compared to before. Though I also agree that there are still residual psychological kinds of effects, where it's still more natural for a lot of people to think of a male leader for example because of how the past was. So it's there, but it seems like the kind of thing some women will exaggerate when they want people to feel guilty about them or if they said something mean towards men one day and didn't at all want to consider that, maybe they could have been more respectful. It's easier to just say, "my life is hard, so I don't have to be nice to people," but it's not a great excuse in my opinion. I feel for those with a hard life, but the "nice to people" part is also important to me.