Neverending lag.


You local connection is only part of the equation and anything from other processes on your client, to connection issues between you and the site could be at the root of the lag you are seeing. Pings to other sites will likely only share a small portion of the path, so while a useful tool to troubleshoot, likely doesn't capture enough of the same path to give a definitive answer.
There are some things that can be done to minimize issues on your end but if there is a problematic connection between you and the site, there may not be much you can do except maybe play with some increment or longer time controls.
https://support.chess.com/article/213-how-do-i-fix-my-disconnect-lag-issues
The site only forgives a certain amount of lag as well.
In regards to your rating, comparisons across pools isn't particularly useful. Some sites start with a different rating and it wouldn't be uncommon to see their pool of players being higher rated. Ratings are really only valid within pools, though there may be some correlation between them.

Update
So, It turns out that I was correct in regard to ratings. My chess rating was consistenly lower on chess.com and I am in fact a 1900- 2100+ player. And then staff tried to educate me on statistical distribution of pools and whatnot, which I was aware already. I´m a statistician, for god´s sake. Couple of weeks later chess.com owns up to their mistake and readjusts bullet ratings. So, yeah, apparenty I was not just being childish or complaining for the sake of complaining. There was a bit of truth to it.