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Are you depressed?
Well I'm GoldyNem, and I'm here to fix that!
In these difficult times, many of us find ourselves struggling with depression. But I'm here to help! Dorito Corporations has perfected a method of eliminating depression, by hurling it into the sun! Just call 225-SAD-YEET and we'll send your depression flying into outer space at at speeds faster than the response time of the thunder! Call within the next 20 minutes and we'll bring back your deleted Minecraft world! That's right, we here at Dorito Corporations have mastered the art of restoration and can only do it if you give us money. Call within the next 1 second and you'll get a face reveal from GoldyNem themse- Whoopsie, looks like that offer has just expired! Come have your depression tossed away for the very cheap price of f(x) = √(25ax-100a^2)
Call today!