just realized this is an ama
Another AMA
Sort:
why is nobody asking questions?
uhh... I can ask you, but asides from that, I don't think anyone is here right now.
👍🐓
RIYA12SA wrote:
And what do I think is the cruelest spell in harry potter
expelliarmus
snoozyman wrote:
👍🐓
wtf
Whats your opinion on fallout new Vegas
Why does it rain every time I'm about to climb a mountain—is Hyrule just passive-aggressive?
Can you cook a Korok if you throw it into a volcano?
Is Revali actually a bird, or just a very angry feather duster?
If you parry a Guardian laser with a soup ladle, do you become King of Hyrule?
How does Link carry 72 shields, 83 swords, 13 bears, and a stack of fish in his pockets?
Link never talks, how did he get so many friends? Should I stop talking too?
Can Ultrahand fix my real-life IKEA furniture?
Is Fuse just Nintendo’s way of saying “go ahead, make a war crime hammer”?
If I stick a minecart to a Zonai rocket to a Korok to a cow... is that art?
Why are the sages all cooler than Link, and why do they follow him like he's the unpopular kid with snacks?
If you fall from the Sky Islands for 12 minutes straight, does Link eventually hit a loading screen or just despair?
Is Zelda actually a dragon, or is this just another plot twist like “Sheik is Zelda” but 10x more chaotic?
How many mushrooms does it take before Link legally becomes part of the forest?
Can Zelda summon an army of beds to just knock Ganon unconscious with comfort?
If Zelda uses magic to solve puzzles, can she magic me a functional sleep schedule?
If we hear Zelda’s inner thoughts, will they all just be “why is everyone like this?”
Why is everyone in Skyloft okay with living on floating rocks with no guardrails?
If Groose got his own spinoff, would it be called Groose of the Wild?
Is Fi a sword or just Google Assistant with anxiety?
Can I sue Ghirahim for emotional damage and unnecessary ballet?
Why does Link become the most powerful soldier in history with zero military training?
Why does Tingle exist, and why is he allowed to fight?
If you pause time while fighting 400 enemies, do they just stand there awkwardly?
Is the real villain in Hyrule Warriors just poor time management?
How does Impa stay calm while babysitting literal timelines?
Can Zelda Echo herself into an army of Zeldas and finally fix every timeline at once?
What if her wand accidentally echoes Ganon—do we just give up?
Can she make an echo of a door to avoid using keys forever?
Does Zelda finally get pants, or is this still a dress-only hero journey?
If Zelda echoes food, is it calorie-free or a war crime against nutrition?
Can I use the motion controls to swat at Fi every time she says “your batteries are low”?
If Skyloft is floating in the sky, where is the plumbing?
How does Ghirahim have sharper cheekbones than any sword in the game?
What does Link actually major in at Knight Academy—Screaming 101?
Is it illegal to name my Loftwing “Pigeon” and throw it at monsters?
Why is everyone 3x stronger than Ganon but still somehow losing?
Why does every female character fight in heels? Are those +5 in Speed?
Can you unlock “Hyrule HR” as a side quest to file complaints about timeline inconsistencies?
If I pause the game while mid-sword swing, does the sword also take a coffee break?
Why is Tetra a literal child running battlefield strategy while I forget how to dodge?
If I Ultrahand my house to a rocket, can I make it the first flying Airbnb?
Why do Zonai devices run on batteries and not good vibes like everything else in Hyrule?
Can I fuse a chicken to my sword and become the Poultry Paladin?
If Link had a LinkedIn, would his job title be "Skydiving Craftsman with Explosive Creativity"?
Can I legally adopt every Korok I “help” or is this just elaborate child labor?
If I build a death machine for a Korok to “reach his friend,” does that make me the villain or the innovator?
What’s in Link’s head when he's silent—ancient wisdom or elevator music?
If I attach 12 rockets to a log and survive the launch, does that count as a divine trial?
Is the Blood Moon just Ganon’s way of resetting the map because he’s a sore loser?
If I ride a bear into Hyrule Castle, do I get a secret cutscene or just instant death?
Are all the Koroks just baby Yodas with a serious leaf addiction?
If I cook five bananas, three lizards, and a shoe, will it still give me full hearts?
Why is every horse terrified of a slope more than an actual monster?
If I feed 400 apples to a horse, does it turn into an unstoppable mount of justice, or just a very well-fed animal?
If I shoot a bomb arrow at a tree, can I be the first person to cause a forest fire in Hyrule, or am I just the first one to be that reckless?
If I wear the Majora’s Mask and talk to a Korok, does it start questioning its entire existence like I do when I look in the mirror?
Why does Link throw a tantrum when his shield breaks but stays chill when he gets shot by a laser beam from a Guardian?
If I pet a dog in Hyrule, does it follow me around or demand I pay it in apples for friendship?
If I cook a rusty sword in the pot, will I create a dish so bad even the Bokoblins refuse to eat it?
If I fuse a rock with a shield, will I become the world's first living, walking pebble fortress?
Can I save the world by simply walking in circles around the castle with my horse until Ganon gets dizzy and quits?
If I attach a Zonai rocket to my house, do I get a “Hyrule’s First Space Mission” achievement or just permanent eviction?
Does Link ever genuinely enjoy the absurdity of his life, or does he just cry silently into his tunic every night?
If I Ultrahand a tree and throw it at a Bokoblin, do I get an achievement called "Lumberjack of Destruction"?
Can I fuse a Korok to a shield and use it as a tiny, annoying bodyguard?
If I attach 7 Zonai rockets to a chicken, does it become a legitimate weapon of mass destruction?
What happens if I fuse a cannon to my face? Is that Link's new "ultimate transformation" or just the ultimate bad idea?
Why is the Master Sword literally everywhere except where I need it? Is it on vacation?
If I build a rollercoaster to cross Hyrule, do I get a side quest to create the world’s first amusement park?
Can Zelda finally do a spin-off game where she just bakes pies and talks to her sages, or would that be too boring for the people who love chaotic energy?
If Zelda’s echoing herself, is it a paradox if one of the echoes tries to correct her timeline mistakes, or do they all just throw a party instead?
Can I summon a horde of Bokoblins as a distraction while I steal the Triforce, or would that be “too much effort for a quick heist”?
If I give Zelda a salad, will she finally gain the power of “making all the right decisions” for the timeline?
Why don’t we ever hear about Zelda’s hobbies—does she collect Korok seeds, or is she secretly obsessed with gardening?
Why do the Gorons make such a big deal about bombs when Link literally has five bombs in his inventory and they can’t even stop a tiny rock slide?
Can I change my Loftwing’s name to “Cloud Shark” and make it as terrifying as possible to all the enemies below?
If I have an endless supply of pumpkins, can I make an infinite pumpkin army to overthrow Ghirahim? Or will they just rot before I get the chance?
Why is it that Fi never tells Link to do anything useful like, I don’t know, “hey, maybe save your game here, buddy”?
Does Fi exist solely to remind me how bad I am at motion controls, or is there a deeper, more existential meaning to her role?
Why does Groose keep coming back to save the day when his “plan” is basically just “screech really loud until things explode”?
If Link and Groose high five, does that create a reality where their combined powers can conquer anything... including the game’s budget?
If Link gets an army of 100 Bokoblins to fight for him, does that make him a Bokoblin King or just a very confused military leader?
If you unlock a secret character in Hyrule Warriors and it’s just a Korok in a mech suit, is that more or less terrifying than the actual bosses?
Why are there so many versions of Ganon? Are they all his extended family, or is he secretly just a really bad reality TV star trying to get more screen time?
Does the Hyrule Warriors team ever wonder if they’ve accidentally created the most dysfunctional family in all of Zelda history, or are they too busy defeating Ganon to care?
Can I hire Midna as a motivational speaker for Link? Because it seems like she’d be really good at yelling at him.
If Link just throws bombs at every enemy all the time, do I still need to learn how to fight or can I just spam my way to victory?
What if Ganon was actually just trying to get some sleep, but Link and Zelda keep bothering him with “world-saving” duties? Maybe he just needs a nap!
What if the entire Hyrule Warriors timeline is actually just a fever dream from Link’s many, many concussions?
Zelda is secretly collecting every single Korok seed so she can create an army of perfectly organized Korok soldiers, and one day, they’ll be unleashed upon Ganon. It's a long-term strategy.
What if Fi is trying to protect Link, but she just doesn’t know how to communicate without being extra weird?
What if the real villain of Breath of the Wild is just the weather? It always rains when I’m climbing mountains, and that feels personal.
CarTheSlay wrote:
Why does it rain every time I'm about to climb a mountain—is Hyrule just passive-aggressive?
Can you cook a Korok if you throw it into a volcano?
Is Revali actually a bird, or just a very angry feather duster?
If you parry a Guardian laser with a soup ladle, do you become King of Hyrule?
How does Link carry 72 shields, 83 swords, 13 bears, and a stack of fish in his pockets?
Link never talks, how did he get so many friends? Should I stop talking too?
Can Ultrahand fix my real-life IKEA furniture?
Is Fuse just Nintendo’s way of saying “go ahead, make a war crime hammer”?
If I stick a minecart to a Zonai rocket to a Korok to a cow... is that art?
Why are the sages all cooler than Link, and why do they follow him like he's the unpopular kid with snacks?
If you fall from the Sky Islands for 12 minutes straight, does Link eventually hit a loading screen or just despair?
Is Zelda actually a dragon, or is this just another plot twist like “Sheik is Zelda” but 10x more chaotic?
How many mushrooms does it take before Link legally becomes part of the forest?
Can Zelda summon an army of beds to just knock Ganon unconscious with comfort?
If Zelda uses magic to solve puzzles, can she magic me a functional sleep schedule?
If we hear Zelda’s inner thoughts, will they all just be “why is everyone like this?”
Why is everyone in Skyloft okay with living on floating rocks with no guardrails?
If Groose got his own spinoff, would it be called Groose of the Wild?
Is Fi a sword or just Google Assistant with anxiety?
Can I sue Ghirahim for emotional damage and unnecessary ballet?
Why does Link become the most powerful soldier in history with zero military training?
Why does Tingle exist, and why is he allowed to fight?
If you pause time while fighting 400 enemies, do they just stand there awkwardly?
Is the real villain in Hyrule Warriors just poor time management?
How does Impa stay calm while babysitting literal timelines?
Can Zelda Echo herself into an army of Zeldas and finally fix every timeline at once?
What if her wand accidentally echoes Ganon—do we just give up?
Can she make an echo of a door to avoid using keys forever?
Does Zelda finally get pants, or is this still a dress-only hero journey?
If Zelda echoes food, is it calorie-free or a war crime against nutrition?
Can I use the motion controls to swat at Fi every time she says “your batteries are low”?
If Skyloft is floating in the sky, where is the plumbing?
How does Ghirahim have sharper cheekbones than any sword in the game?
What does Link actually major in at Knight Academy—Screaming 101?
Is it illegal to name my Loftwing “Pigeon” and throw it at monsters?
Why is everyone 3x stronger than Ganon but still somehow losing?
Why does every female character fight in heels? Are those +5 in Speed?
Can you unlock “Hyrule HR” as a side quest to file complaints about timeline inconsistencies?
If I pause the game while mid-sword swing, does the sword also take a coffee break?
Why is Tetra a literal child running battlefield strategy while I forget how to dodge?
If I Ultrahand my house to a rocket, can I make it the first flying Airbnb?
Why do Zonai devices run on batteries and not good vibes like everything else in Hyrule?
Can I fuse a chicken to my sword and become the Poultry Paladin?
If Link had a LinkedIn, would his job title be "Skydiving Craftsman with Explosive Creativity"?
Can I legally adopt every Korok I “help” or is this just elaborate child labor?
If I build a death machine for a Korok to “reach his friend,” does that make me the villain or the innovator?
What’s in Link’s head when he's silent—ancient wisdom or elevator music?
If I attach 12 rockets to a log and survive the launch, does that count as a divine trial?
Is the Blood Moon just Ganon’s way of resetting the map because he’s a sore loser?
If I ride a bear into Hyrule Castle, do I get a secret cutscene or just instant death?
Are all the Koroks just baby Yodas with a serious leaf addiction?
If I cook five bananas, three lizards, and a shoe, will it still give me full hearts?
Why is every horse terrified of a slope more than an actual monster?
If I feed 400 apples to a horse, does it turn into an unstoppable mount of justice, or just a very well-fed animal?
If I shoot a bomb arrow at a tree, can I be the first person to cause a forest fire in Hyrule, or am I just the first one to be that reckless?
If I wear the Majora’s Mask and talk to a Korok, does it start questioning its entire existence like I do when I look in the mirror?
Why does Link throw a tantrum when his shield breaks but stays chill when he gets shot by a laser beam from a Guardian?
If I pet a dog in Hyrule, does it follow me around or demand I pay it in apples for friendship?
If I cook a rusty sword in the pot, will I create a dish so bad even the Bokoblins refuse to eat it?
If I fuse a rock with a shield, will I become the world's first living, walking pebble fortress?
Can I save the world by simply walking in circles around the castle with my horse until Ganon gets dizzy and quits?
If I attach a Zonai rocket to my house, do I get a “Hyrule’s First Space Mission” achievement or just permanent eviction?
Does Link ever genuinely enjoy the absurdity of his life, or does he just cry silently into his tunic every night?
If I Ultrahand a tree and throw it at a Bokoblin, do I get an achievement called "Lumberjack of Destruction"?
Can I fuse a Korok to a shield and use it as a tiny, annoying bodyguard?
If I attach 7 Zonai rockets to a chicken, does it become a legitimate weapon of mass destruction?
What happens if I fuse a cannon to my face? Is that Link's new "ultimate transformation" or just the ultimate bad idea?
Why is the Master Sword literally everywhere except where I need it? Is it on vacation?
If I build a rollercoaster to cross Hyrule, do I get a side quest to create the world’s first amusement park?
Can Zelda finally do a spin-off game where she just bakes pies and talks to her sages, or would that be too boring for the people who love chaotic energy?
If Zelda’s echoing herself, is it a paradox if one of the echoes tries to correct her timeline mistakes, or do they all just throw a party instead?
Can I summon a horde of Bokoblins as a distraction while I steal the Triforce, or would that be “too much effort for a quick heist”?
If I give Zelda a salad, will she finally gain the power of “making all the right decisions” for the timeline?
Why don’t we ever hear about Zelda’s hobbies—does she collect Korok seeds, or is she secretly obsessed with gardening?
Why do the Gorons make such a big deal about bombs when Link literally has five bombs in his inventory and they can’t even stop a tiny rock slide?
Can I change my Loftwing’s name to “Cloud Shark” and make it as terrifying as possible to all the enemies below?
If I have an endless supply of pumpkins, can I make an infinite pumpkin army to overthrow Ghirahim? Or will they just rot before I get the chance?
Why is it that Fi never tells Link to do anything useful like, I don’t know, “hey, maybe save your game here, buddy”?
Does Fi exist solely to remind me how bad I am at motion controls, or is there a deeper, more existential meaning to her role?
Why does Groose keep coming back to save the day when his “plan” is basically just “screech really loud until things explode”?
If Link and Groose high five, does that create a reality where their combined powers can conquer anything... including the game’s budget?
If Link gets an army of 100 Bokoblins to fight for him, does that make him a Bokoblin King or just a very confused military leader?
If you unlock a secret character in Hyrule Warriors and it’s just a Korok in a mech suit, is that more or less terrifying than the actual bosses?
Why are there so many versions of Ganon? Are they all his extended family, or is he secretly just a really bad reality TV star trying to get more screen time?
Does the Hyrule Warriors team ever wonder if they’ve accidentally created the most dysfunctional family in all of Zelda history, or are they too busy defeating Ganon to care?
Can I hire Midna as a motivational speaker for Link? Because it seems like she’d be really good at yelling at him.
If Link just throws bombs at every enemy all the time, do I still need to learn how to fight or can I just spam my way to victory?
What if Ganon was actually just trying to get some sleep, but Link and Zelda keep bothering him with “world-saving” duties? Maybe he just needs a nap!
What if the entire Hyrule Warriors timeline is actually just a fever dream from Link’s many, many concussions?
Zelda is secretly collecting every single Korok seed so she can create an army of perfectly organized Korok soldiers, and one day, they’ll be unleashed upon Ganon. It's a long-term strategy.
What if Fi is trying to protect Link, but she just doesn’t know how to communicate without being extra weird?
What if the real villain of Breath of the Wild is just the weather? It always rains when I’m climbing mountains, and that feels personal.
wtfh i cant read that
The weather is annoying, but just wait and watch YT or something and the weather will change
maxkeplerisme wrote:
Whats your opinion on fallout new Vegas
havent played it
CarTheSlay wrote:
Why does it rain every time I'm about to climb a mountain—is Hyrule just passive-aggressive?
Can you cook a Korok if you throw it into a volcano?
Is Revali actually a bird, or just a very angry feather duster?
If you parry a Guardian laser with a soup ladle, do you become King of Hyrule?
How does Link carry 72 shields, 83 swords, 13 bears, and a stack of fish in his pockets?
Link never talks, how did he get so many friends? Should I stop talking too?
Can Ultrahand fix my real-life IKEA furniture?
Is Fuse just Nintendo’s way of saying “go ahead, make a war crime hammer”?
If I stick a minecart to a Zonai rocket to a Korok to a cow... is that art?
Why are the sages all cooler than Link, and why do they follow him like he's the unpopular kid with snacks?
If you fall from the Sky Islands for 12 minutes straight, does Link eventually hit a loading screen or just despair?
Is Zelda actually a dragon, or is this just another plot twist like “Sheik is Zelda” but 10x more chaotic?
How many mushrooms does it take before Link legally becomes part of the forest?
Can Zelda summon an army of beds to just knock Ganon unconscious with comfort?
If Zelda uses magic to solve puzzles, can she magic me a functional sleep schedule?
If we hear Zelda’s inner thoughts, will they all just be “why is everyone like this?”
Why is everyone in Skyloft okay with living on floating rocks with no guardrails?
If Groose got his own spinoff, would it be called Groose of the Wild?
Is Fi a sword or just Google Assistant with anxiety?
Can I sue Ghirahim for emotional damage and unnecessary ballet?
Why does Link become the most powerful soldier in history with zero military training?
Why does Tingle exist, and why is he allowed to fight?
If you pause time while fighting 400 enemies, do they just stand there awkwardly?
Is the real villain in Hyrule Warriors just poor time management?
How does Impa stay calm while babysitting literal timelines?
Can Zelda Echo herself into an army of Zeldas and finally fix every timeline at once?
What if her wand accidentally echoes Ganon—do we just give up?
Can she make an echo of a door to avoid using keys forever?
Does Zelda finally get pants, or is this still a dress-only hero journey?
If Zelda echoes food, is it calorie-free or a war crime against nutrition?
Can I use the motion controls to swat at Fi every time she says “your batteries are low”?
If Skyloft is floating in the sky, where is the plumbing?
How does Ghirahim have sharper cheekbones than any sword in the game?
What does Link actually major in at Knight Academy—Screaming 101?
Is it illegal to name my Loftwing “Pigeon” and throw it at monsters?
Why is everyone 3x stronger than Ganon but still somehow losing?
Why does every female character fight in heels? Are those +5 in Speed?
Can you unlock “Hyrule HR” as a side quest to file complaints about timeline inconsistencies?
If I pause the game while mid-sword swing, does the sword also take a coffee break?
Why is Tetra a literal child running battlefield strategy while I forget how to dodge?
If I Ultrahand my house to a rocket, can I make it the first flying Airbnb?
Why do Zonai devices run on batteries and not good vibes like everything else in Hyrule?
Can I fuse a chicken to my sword and become the Poultry Paladin?
If Link had a LinkedIn, would his job title be "Skydiving Craftsman with Explosive Creativity"?
Can I legally adopt every Korok I “help” or is this just elaborate child labor?
If I build a death machine for a Korok to “reach his friend,” does that make me the villain or the innovator?
What’s in Link’s head when he's silent—ancient wisdom or elevator music?
If I attach 12 rockets to a log and survive the launch, does that count as a divine trial?
Is the Blood Moon just Ganon’s way of resetting the map because he’s a sore loser?
If I ride a bear into Hyrule Castle, do I get a secret cutscene or just instant death?
Are all the Koroks just baby Yodas with a serious leaf addiction?
If I cook five bananas, three lizards, and a shoe, will it still give me full hearts?
Why is every horse terrified of a slope more than an actual monster?
If I feed 400 apples to a horse, does it turn into an unstoppable mount of justice, or just a very well-fed animal?
If I shoot a bomb arrow at a tree, can I be the first person to cause a forest fire in Hyrule, or am I just the first one to be that reckless?
If I wear the Majora’s Mask and talk to a Korok, does it start questioning its entire existence like I do when I look in the mirror?
Why does Link throw a tantrum when his shield breaks but stays chill when he gets shot by a laser beam from a Guardian?
If I pet a dog in Hyrule, does it follow me around or demand I pay it in apples for friendship?
If I cook a rusty sword in the pot, will I create a dish so bad even the Bokoblins refuse to eat it?
If I fuse a rock with a shield, will I become the world's first living, walking pebble fortress?
Can I save the world by simply walking in circles around the castle with my horse until Ganon gets dizzy and quits?
If I attach a Zonai rocket to my house, do I get a “Hyrule’s First Space Mission” achievement or just permanent eviction?
Does Link ever genuinely enjoy the absurdity of his life, or does he just cry silently into his tunic every night?
If I Ultrahand a tree and throw it at a Bokoblin, do I get an achievement called "Lumberjack of Destruction"?
Can I fuse a Korok to a shield and use it as a tiny, annoying bodyguard?
If I attach 7 Zonai rockets to a chicken, does it become a legitimate weapon of mass destruction?
What happens if I fuse a cannon to my face? Is that Link's new "ultimate transformation" or just the ultimate bad idea?
Why is the Master Sword literally everywhere except where I need it? Is it on vacation?
If I build a rollercoaster to cross Hyrule, do I get a side quest to create the world’s first amusement park?
Can Zelda finally do a spin-off game where she just bakes pies and talks to her sages, or would that be too boring for the people who love chaotic energy?
If Zelda’s echoing herself, is it a paradox if one of the echoes tries to correct her timeline mistakes, or do they all just throw a party instead?
Can I summon a horde of Bokoblins as a distraction while I steal the Triforce, or would that be “too much effort for a quick heist”?
If I give Zelda a salad, will she finally gain the power of “making all the right decisions” for the timeline?
Why don’t we ever hear about Zelda’s hobbies—does she collect Korok seeds, or is she secretly obsessed with gardening?
Why do the Gorons make such a big deal about bombs when Link literally has five bombs in his inventory and they can’t even stop a tiny rock slide?
Can I change my Loftwing’s name to “Cloud Shark” and make it as terrifying as possible to all the enemies below?
If I have an endless supply of pumpkins, can I make an infinite pumpkin army to overthrow Ghirahim? Or will they just rot before I get the chance?
Why is it that Fi never tells Link to do anything useful like, I don’t know, “hey, maybe save your game here, buddy”?
Does Fi exist solely to remind me how bad I am at motion controls, or is there a deeper, more existential meaning to her role?
Why does Groose keep coming back to save the day when his “plan” is basically just “screech really loud until things explode”?
If Link and Groose high five, does that create a reality where their combined powers can conquer anything... including the game’s budget?
If Link gets an army of 100 Bokoblins to fight for him, does that make him a Bokoblin King or just a very confused military leader?
If you unlock a secret character in Hyrule Warriors and it’s just a Korok in a mech suit, is that more or less terrifying than the actual bosses?
Why are there so many versions of Ganon? Are they all his extended family, or is he secretly just a really bad reality TV star trying to get more screen time?
Does the Hyrule Warriors team ever wonder if they’ve accidentally created the most dysfunctional family in all of Zelda history, or are they too busy defeating Ganon to care?
Can I hire Midna as a motivational speaker for Link? Because it seems like she’d be really good at yelling at him.
If Link just throws bombs at every enemy all the time, do I still need to learn how to fight or can I just spam my way to victory?
What if Ganon was actually just trying to get some sleep, but Link and Zelda keep bothering him with “world-saving” duties? Maybe he just needs a nap!
What if the entire Hyrule Warriors timeline is actually just a fever dream from Link’s many, many concussions?
Zelda is secretly collecting every single Korok seed so she can create an army of perfectly organized Korok soldiers, and one day, they’ll be unleashed upon Ganon. It's a long-term strategy.
What if Fi is trying to protect Link, but she just doesn’t know how to communicate without being extra weird?
What if the real villain of Breath of the Wild is just the weather? It always rains when I’m climbing mountains, and that feels personal.
Bro took 'why aren't you asking questions' personally.
CarTheSlay wrote:
Why does it rain every time I'm about to climb a mountain—is Hyrule just passive-aggressive?
Can you cook a Korok if you throw it into a volcano?
Is Revali actually a bird, or just a very angry feather duster?
If you parry a Guardian laser with a soup ladle, do you become King of Hyrule?
How does Link carry 72 shields, 83 swords, 13 bears, and a stack of fish in his pockets?
Link never talks, how did he get so many friends? Should I stop talking too?
Can Ultrahand fix my real-life IKEA furniture?
Is Fuse just Nintendo’s way of saying “go ahead, make a war crime hammer”?
If I stick a minecart to a Zonai rocket to a Korok to a cow... is that art?
Why are the sages all cooler than Link, and why do they follow him like he's the unpopular kid with snacks?
If you fall from the Sky Islands for 12 minutes straight, does Link eventually hit a loading screen or just despair?
Is Zelda actually a dragon, or is this just another plot twist like “Sheik is Zelda” but 10x more chaotic?
How many mushrooms does it take before Link legally becomes part of the forest?
Can Zelda summon an army of beds to just knock Ganon unconscious with comfort?
If Zelda uses magic to solve puzzles, can she magic me a functional sleep schedule?
If we hear Zelda’s inner thoughts, will they all just be “why is everyone like this?”
Why is everyone in Skyloft okay with living on floating rocks with no guardrails?
If Groose got his own spinoff, would it be called Groose of the Wild?
Is Fi a sword or just Google Assistant with anxiety?
Can I sue Ghirahim for emotional damage and unnecessary ballet?
Why does Link become the most powerful soldier in history with zero military training?
Why does Tingle exist, and why is he allowed to fight?
If you pause time while fighting 400 enemies, do they just stand there awkwardly?
Is the real villain in Hyrule Warriors just poor time management?
How does Impa stay calm while babysitting literal timelines?
Can Zelda Echo herself into an army of Zeldas and finally fix every timeline at once?
What if her wand accidentally echoes Ganon—do we just give up?
Can she make an echo of a door to avoid using keys forever?
Does Zelda finally get pants, or is this still a dress-only hero journey?
If Zelda echoes food, is it calorie-free or a war crime against nutrition?
Can I use the motion controls to swat at Fi every time she says “your batteries are low”?
If Skyloft is floating in the sky, where is the plumbing?
How does Ghirahim have sharper cheekbones than any sword in the game?
What does Link actually major in at Knight Academy—Screaming 101?
Is it illegal to name my Loftwing “Pigeon” and throw it at monsters?
Why is everyone 3x stronger than Ganon but still somehow losing?
Why does every female character fight in heels? Are those +5 in Speed?
Can you unlock “Hyrule HR” as a side quest to file complaints about timeline inconsistencies?
If I pause the game while mid-sword swing, does the sword also take a coffee break?
Why is Tetra a literal child running battlefield strategy while I forget how to dodge?
If I Ultrahand my house to a rocket, can I make it the first flying Airbnb?
Why do Zonai devices run on batteries and not good vibes like everything else in Hyrule?
Can I fuse a chicken to my sword and become the Poultry Paladin?
If Link had a LinkedIn, would his job title be "Skydiving Craftsman with Explosive Creativity"?
Can I legally adopt every Korok I “help” or is this just elaborate child labor?
If I build a death machine for a Korok to “reach his friend,” does that make me the villain or the innovator?
What’s in Link’s head when he's silent—ancient wisdom or elevator music?
If I attach 12 rockets to a log and survive the launch, does that count as a divine trial?
Is the Blood Moon just Ganon’s way of resetting the map because he’s a sore loser?
If I ride a bear into Hyrule Castle, do I get a secret cutscene or just instant death?
Are all the Koroks just baby Yodas with a serious leaf addiction?
If I cook five bananas, three lizards, and a shoe, will it still give me full hearts?
Why is every horse terrified of a slope more than an actual monster?
If I feed 400 apples to a horse, does it turn into an unstoppable mount of justice, or just a very well-fed animal?
If I shoot a bomb arrow at a tree, can I be the first person to cause a forest fire in Hyrule, or am I just the first one to be that reckless?
If I wear the Majora’s Mask and talk to a Korok, does it start questioning its entire existence like I do when I look in the mirror?
Why does Link throw a tantrum when his shield breaks but stays chill when he gets shot by a laser beam from a Guardian?
If I pet a dog in Hyrule, does it follow me around or demand I pay it in apples for friendship?
If I cook a rusty sword in the pot, will I create a dish so bad even the Bokoblins refuse to eat it?
If I fuse a rock with a shield, will I become the world's first living, walking pebble fortress?
Can I save the world by simply walking in circles around the castle with my horse until Ganon gets dizzy and quits?
If I attach a Zonai rocket to my house, do I get a “Hyrule’s First Space Mission” achievement or just permanent eviction?
Does Link ever genuinely enjoy the absurdity of his life, or does he just cry silently into his tunic every night?
If I Ultrahand a tree and throw it at a Bokoblin, do I get an achievement called "Lumberjack of Destruction"?
Can I fuse a Korok to a shield and use it as a tiny, annoying bodyguard?
If I attach 7 Zonai rockets to a chicken, does it become a legitimate weapon of mass destruction?
What happens if I fuse a cannon to my face? Is that Link's new "ultimate transformation" or just the ultimate bad idea?
Why is the Master Sword literally everywhere except where I need it? Is it on vacation?
If I build a rollercoaster to cross Hyrule, do I get a side quest to create the world’s first amusement park?
Can Zelda finally do a spin-off game where she just bakes pies and talks to her sages, or would that be too boring for the people who love chaotic energy?
If Zelda’s echoing herself, is it a paradox if one of the echoes tries to correct her timeline mistakes, or do they all just throw a party instead?
Can I summon a horde of Bokoblins as a distraction while I steal the Triforce, or would that be “too much effort for a quick heist”?
If I give Zelda a salad, will she finally gain the power of “making all the right decisions” for the timeline?
Why don’t we ever hear about Zelda’s hobbies—does she collect Korok seeds, or is she secretly obsessed with gardening?
Why do the Gorons make such a big deal about bombs when Link literally has five bombs in his inventory and they can’t even stop a tiny rock slide?
Can I change my Loftwing’s name to “Cloud Shark” and make it as terrifying as possible to all the enemies below?
If I have an endless supply of pumpkins, can I make an infinite pumpkin army to overthrow Ghirahim? Or will they just rot before I get the chance?
Why is it that Fi never tells Link to do anything useful like, I don’t know, “hey, maybe save your game here, buddy”?
Does Fi exist solely to remind me how bad I am at motion controls, or is there a deeper, more existential meaning to her role?
Why does Groose keep coming back to save the day when his “plan” is basically just “screech really loud until things explode”?
If Link and Groose high five, does that create a reality where their combined powers can conquer anything... including the game’s budget?
If Link gets an army of 100 Bokoblins to fight for him, does that make him a Bokoblin King or just a very confused military leader?
If you unlock a secret character in Hyrule Warriors and it’s just a Korok in a mech suit, is that more or less terrifying than the actual bosses?
Why are there so many versions of Ganon? Are they all his extended family, or is he secretly just a really bad reality TV star trying to get more screen time?
Does the Hyrule Warriors team ever wonder if they’ve accidentally created the most dysfunctional family in all of Zelda history, or are they too busy defeating Ganon to care?
Can I hire Midna as a motivational speaker for Link? Because it seems like she’d be really good at yelling at him.
If Link just throws bombs at every enemy all the time, do I still need to learn how to fight or can I just spam my way to victory?
What if Ganon was actually just trying to get some sleep, but Link and Zelda keep bothering him with “world-saving” duties? Maybe he just needs a nap!
What if the entire Hyrule Warriors timeline is actually just a fever dream from Link’s many, many concussions?
Zelda is secretly collecting every single Korok seed so she can create an army of perfectly organized Korok soldiers, and one day, they’ll be unleashed upon Ganon. It's a long-term strategy.
What if Fi is trying to protect Link, but she just doesn’t know how to communicate without being extra weird?
What if the real villain of Breath of the Wild is just the weather? It always rains when I’m climbing mountains, and that feels personal.
Here we go:
1. Why does it rain every time I'm about to climb a mountain—is Hyrule just passive-aggressive?
Yes. Hyrule is basically that friend who sees you succeed and whispers, “What if… you slipped?”
2. Can you cook a Korok if you throw it into a volcano?
Technically no. But morally? Also no. They're basically leafy toddlers with a GPS obsession.
3. Is Revali actually a bird, or just a very angry feather duster?
Yes.
4. If you parry a Guardian laser with a soup ladle, do you become King of Hyrule?
You don’t become king—you become legend. A culinary god.
5. How does Link carry 72 shields, 83 swords, 13 bears, and a stack of fish in his pockets?
Link doesn’t have pockets. He has the void. Physics left the chat.
6. Link never talks, how did he get so many friends? Should I stop talking too?
Link radiates “will quietly help you move a couch at 3am” energy. Silence is his love language. Talking’s fine—just maybe occasionally brood while staring dramatically at mountains.
7. Can Ultrahand fix my real-life IKEA furniture?
Yes, but it will also attach your coffee table to your ceiling fan and call it “art.”
8. Is Fuse just Nintendo’s way of saying “go ahead, make a war crime hammer”?
100%. “Here’s a flamethrower and a mop. Go nuts.”
9. If I stick a minecart to a Zonai rocket to a Korok to a cow... is that art?
That’s not just art. That’s a Zonai Renaissance piece.
10. Why are the sages all cooler than Link, and why do they follow him like he's the unpopular kid with snacks?
Because Link is the chaos glue holding their overly powerful personalities together. Also: snacks.
11. If you fall from the Sky Islands for 12 minutes straight, does Link eventually hit a loading screen or just despair?
Despair. The loading screen is optional.
12. Is Zelda actually a dragon, or is this just another plot twist like “Sheik is Zelda” but 10x more chaotic?
Yes. And it’s beautiful. And it makes zero sense. Welcome to Zelda lore.
13. How many mushrooms does it take before Link legally becomes part of the forest?
After 37, Hestu starts calling him “cousin.”
14. Can Zelda summon an army of beds to just knock Ganon unconscious with comfort?
That would be the most passive-aggressive victory ever. I’m here for it.
15. If Zelda uses magic to solve puzzles, can she magic me a functional sleep schedule?
No spell is that powerful. Not even the Triforce.
16. If we hear Zelda’s inner thoughts, will they all just be “why is everyone like this?”
It’s 80% that and 20% “Link please stop attaching rockets to livestock.”
17. Why is everyone in Skyloft okay with living on floating rocks with no guardrails?
They were born with a passive death wish and Loftwings.
18. If Groose got his own spinoff, would it be called Groose of the Wild?
No, it would be Groosebumps: Hyrule Drift.
19. Is Fi a sword or just Google Assistant with anxiety?
“Master, your battery is low and your life choices are questionable.”
20. Can I sue Ghirahim for emotional damage and unnecessary ballet?
Only if you bring a dance lawyer.
21. Why does Link become the most powerful soldier in history with zero military training?
Because raw vibes, chaotic curiosity, and enough stamina food can beat any war plan.
22. Why does Tingle exist, and why is he allowed to fight?
He's the multiverse's cursed mascot. Fear him.
23. If you pause time while fighting 400 enemies, do they just stand there awkwardly?
Yes. Some start reevaluating their career paths.
24. Is the real villain in Hyrule Warriors just poor time management?
Absolutely. The calendar is the true final boss.
25. How does Impa stay calm while babysitting literal timelines?
Caffeine, rage suppression, and a daily nap that shatters spacetime.
26. Can Zelda Echo herself into an army of Zeldas and finally fix every timeline at once?
Yes, but then it just becomes a chaotic book club with no solutions.
27. What if her wand accidentally echoes Ganon—do we just give up?
Yes. Run. Change your name. Become a beet farmer.
28. Can she make an echo of a door to avoid using keys forever?
That’s illegal in at least three temples.
29. Does Zelda finally get pants, or is this still a dress-only hero journey?
She earned those pants in Tears of the Kingdom. Dress code: flexible.
30. If Zelda echoes food, is it calorie-free or a war crime against nutrition?
It’s ghost food. Deliciously irrelevant to digestion.
31. Can I use the motion controls to swat at Fi every time she says “your batteries are low”?
That’s the only time motion controls should be mandatory.
32. If Skyloft is floating in the sky, where is the plumbing?
Some questions are better left unanswered for everyone’s peace of mind.
33. How does Ghirahim have sharper cheekbones than any sword in the game?
He was carved by the same entity that made Final Fantasy protagonists.
34. What does Link actually major in at Knight Academy—Screaming 101?
With a minor in Explosive Carpentry.
35. Is it illegal to name my Loftwing “Pigeon” and throw it at monsters?
Only if you name the monsters “Bread Crumbs.”
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lol, im the best self-glazer
🙄