The Last Emperor (Minecraft Edition): Transcript (Part 1)
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6 days ago
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#8
What's so bad about a transcript of a planned movie about the literal last emperor of China bruh
It's better than brainrot
I don't know who these people are, but the chicken jockey bit is nice. I think I have heard of PrestonPlayz before...
[ambience]
PrestonPlayz: Prisoners head north!
Puyi: What on earth was he talking about?!
PrestonPlayz: Prisoner number 981! Be quiet and just go north already!
Puyi: Who is this and why is he screaming like crazy?!
CaptainSparklez: Bro, chill. He is just a guard in the Fushun War Criminals Management Center.
Puyi: Fushun what?
CaptainSparklez: Fushun War Criminals Management Center.
Puyi: Where am I?
CaptainSparklez: The People's Republic of China.
[flashback to 1908] [Puyi is in a minecart, surrounded by eunuchs and mounted Imperial guards]
Puyi: Papa, I wanna go home.
Zaifeng: No! Look at the Forbidden City.
[Puyi is in the throne room, summonned by Empress Dowager Cixi]
Cixi: You, as the Emperor of the Qing Dynasty, are the Lord of 10,000 Years. Eunuchs of the Imperial Presence, the black pearl.
[A eunuch puts the black pearl into Cixi's mouth, Cixi steps down the throne and Puyi sits on it]
Technoblade: Today, in the Forbidden City, a new emperor has sat on the throne. His name is, Aisin-Gioro Puyi, son of Zaifeng, has been crowned.
[Hundreds of men chant in Chinese]
Zaifeng: It will soon be over.
Puyi: Look! Chicken jockey!
[Puyi walks to Jack Black, one of the palace officials]
Puyi: Chicken jockey! Where's the chicken jockey?
Jack Black: Here is the chicken jockey, Your Majesty. This shall forever be the Emperor's chicken jockey.
Skeppy: And this is the Throne Room, where you were enthro-
ACookieGod: Time for the Imperial bath!
Puyi: Aphmau! I want to go home!
Aphmau: Not for 10,000 years.
Puyi: I'm hungry!
Dream: Here, Your Majesty. Take this Enchanted Golden Apple.
[the scene cuts to bedtime]
Aphmau: Once upon a time, there was a man named Steve, who fought mercilessly against the Piglin invaders, and defeated their leader, Malgosha...
TO BE CONTINUED