Upgrade to Chess.com Premium!

1000 Signs you play chess too LITTLE!

  • 3 years ago · Quote · #141


    Berder wrote:

    78. You reach an endgame with two kings and no other pieces, but you still get checkmated.

    79. Your knights can't quite jump high enough to get over other pieces.

    80. You tried to fork your opponent's king and queen but found them hard to chew.  Maybe next time you'll try a spoon.

    81. The last time you tried a smothered mate you wound up in the ER for asphyxiation.

    82. You try to sacrifice your queen early because her pointy crown keeps stabbing you in the thumb.

    83. You can never remember whether pawns move forwards or backwards.

    84. Your favorite opening is the Bongcloud.

    85. You once made a mistake setting up the pieces so your king was in checkmate in the starting position.

    Best ones.

  • 3 years ago · Quote · #142


    227. You can't understand why so much study is put into openings -- after all, Ruy Lopez is great, isn't it?

  • 3 years ago · Quote · #143


    228. You don't have any chess pieces.

    229. You call the knights "wooden horses"

  • 3 years ago · Quote · #144


    230. You don't know where to get a chessboard, so you make one out of paper
    231. You call it a draw by insufficient material when you have 2 bishops and king vs. king
    232. You think the king can capture protected pieces
    233. After move 2, you only move your king
    234. You think people sacrificing their queen for checkmate are crazy
    235. You don't know what a back rank mate is
    236. You sacrifice your king because of his pointy cross
    237. You sacrifice your queen early because you don't like its looks
    238. You purposely move your knights where they're unprotected so you can get them off the board because you don't like the way they look
    239. You sacrifice your bishops because you don't like the look of them
    240. You think pawns are cute so you sacrifice every other piece to keep ahold of them
    241. You castle by move 107
    242. You connect your rooks by using magnets to connect them
    243. You pin a piece by sewing it to the board
    244. You think you can only move knights at night

  • 3 years ago · Quote · #145


    245. You always play Fischer Random due to the fact you don't know how to set up the pieces

  • 3 years ago · Quote · #146


    246. You think rooks are immobile castles that the opponent must capture and cannot be moved

  • 3 years ago · Quote · #147


    247. You throw your knight over the pieces
    248. You can't quite learn the pawn moves
    249. You resign after you have sacrificed every possible piece (even your king)
    250. When your opponent takes a pawn en passant, you say, "How do you do that?"

  • 3 years ago · Quote · #148


    You say its for idiots.

  • 3 years ago · Quote · #149


    251. When you see someone is sacrificing his pieces , u said ..that is a "mouse-slip"...

  • 3 years ago · Quote · #150


    253. Your bishop switches colors

  • 3 years ago · Quote · #151


    254. Your USCF rating is 0

    255. You lose to someone who can't even play chess.

    256. You can't fathom why anyone would play hour + games (I actually know someone like this).

    257. You can't fathom why anyone would take longer than 10 seconds on each move (same guy).

  • 3 years ago · Quote · #152


    258. When you say "soulmate" more often than "checkmate" (true story).

  • 3 years ago · Quote · #153


    259. When you start asking where is the dice that you are supposed to roll to determine the next move?

  • 3 years ago · Quote · #154


    260. You are worried that the pieces will commit mutiny.

  • 3 years ago · Quote · #155


    261)you think the queen can also move like a knight

  • 3 years ago · Quote · #156


    I've seen this one in real life

  • 3 years ago · Quote · #157


    262)You don't know what castling is

  • 3 years ago · Quote · #158


    263)When your opponent says check your opponent says "I didn't know I had to pay"

  • 3 years ago · Quote · #159


    264)you get checkmated in two moves

  • 3 years ago · Quote · #160


    265)you agree to play a game with 56 queens and still lose

Back to Top

Post your reply: