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There once was a Glaswegian master
Whose endgames were always disaster,
So he sacced a rook
To get out of book
And lost in no time to a patzer.
There once was a chessplayer from Greenock
Who found that when he played his knees knocked;
The whole board would quiver,
So great were his shivers,
And he was penalised with time docked.
There once was a master from Cadiz
Who thought he was a match for Deep Fritz;
The comp was so good
He vowed that he should
Just play drunks for beer money at blitz.
There once was a player who castled
Straight into a furious assault.
Pins, windmills and sacs
Made up the attacks,
But met with calm and his skill dazzled.
There is just one line in the Dragon
Which has all my defences undone:
Has me on the rack,
Makes me play other sicilians.
There once was a little chess cafe
Where locals would invite you to play.
I think it's still there,
In Amsterdam fair,
The wonderful Gambit Chess Cafe.
There is an instructive queen sac mate,
Where black's king gets smothered at h8:
You play double check,
He goes “What the heck?”
As the queen drops in, but it's too late.
There once was a novice from Parkhead
Who let me play what I dream in bed:
With pawns on g4
And f3, no chore
Is it to imagine what I played.
No great literary masterpieces any of them, just had the notion today and came up with them on my breaks at work, feel free to ridicule or add your own. Any idiot can write limericks, although I confess I have disobeyed the cardinal rule which is that they should either be filthy or funny or both.
There once was a chess player who sucked, and sucked, and sucked, I mean really sucked!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Hmm. 9 syllables, 9 syllables, 5 syllables, 5 syllables, 9 syllables - make lines 1,2 and 5 rhyme together and lines 3 and 4 rhyme together. A little bit more structured next time woodshover, but...er....good first effort.
I thought it was pure genius.
by Fixing_A_Hole a few minutes ago
10/20/2014 - Anand - Radjabov, Linares 2009 Analysis
by legolas-greenleaf 4 minutes ago
How Lonnnnnnnng Untilllllllll V3???
by lasagnaa 9 minutes ago
Ashley's Million-dollar chess tourney - but bring your own clocks
by btickler 27 minutes ago
Only Russian speaking! Ру
by ellie100 27 minutes ago
The fastest move makers in chess.com. Where do I stand
by HaveAnotherGame 34 minutes ago
Need help vs Nimzo!
by Inyustisia 35 minutes ago
Who's your fav in the Top Ten?
by ellie100 41 minutes ago
chess.com on windows phone
by Mobius-0 43 minutes ago
the kopec system(slay the sicilian
by XPLAYERJX 45 minutes ago
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