My Chess Rules

My Chess Rules!

1) Never say 'hi' to your opponent. If he does it first, don't reply: you are too good a player to do that. Yes I know that after 60 moves in an online game you start to think about replying... DO NOT!!!

2) If your opponent makes a mistake don't miss the chance to make fun of him. 'good effort' and 'lol' work just fine, but feel free to make up more offensive lines

3) If you make a mistake and find yourself in a losing position you can:
a) offer a draw
b) disconnect
c) let the time run out

4) If your opponents checkmates you because you didn't see it in time to follow rule 3, immediately demand a rematch: you must take back what that cheater stole. Never, repeat NEVER, congratulate saying 'gg'. If you feel the need to say something you could use something like: 'it was just luck' or 'u r a cheater'.
Iterate this step until you manage to win, then disappear without saying a word: you simply took back what the basterd stole from you. Again: if you need to say something just insult him

5) If your opponent is tryng to cast the shame of a draw upon you: insult him. If doesn't change his mind you should lose with honour or follow the points 3.b or 3.c