Do Brown Cows Make Chocolate Milk? Reprinted courtesy of NW Chess Magazine
Do Brown Cows Make Chocolate Milk?
Family Experiences Around Child-Led Learning
A book written by a Pacific Northwest family shares the joys and benefits of playing chess.
Article originally written in October 2023 for Northwest Chess magazine by Ken Lee
While chess has experienced an explosion of interest in the last few years, one Pacific Northwest family has been joyfully playing and exploring the educational benefits of chess for many years.
In their new book, Do Brown Cows Make Chocolate Milk?, the Sankrithi family (Siva/Dad), Aarti/Mom) and their two sons (Sarang (10 at the time of writing, now 11) and Vivaan (5 at the time of writing, now 7)) share their personal thoughts about the three pillars of their educational world – 1) Chess 2) Music 3) Travel
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I had the pleasure of sitting down with the Sankrithi family to get their unique insights on child-led learning and why they selected the Game of Kings as a central component of their educational and social lives.
Ken: When your parents first discussed this potential book project with you, how did it make you feel?
Vivaan: It felt good because it would be my first time ever making a book and sharing my thoughts with everyone.
Sarang: It felt good because I love family projects and I knew this one would take longer than most and be something I could share with my friends and family members.
Ken: What was the process of writing this book with your family members?
Siva: As a homeschooling family committed to child-led learning, we knew if we were going to go into this process, it would be a collective effort largely led by the kids. It began with them sharing stories and memorable moments in their lives that they felt taught them something. We then thought about what they learned and matched takeaways with stories. Then the writing began!
Aarti: It really started with a list of curious questions we’d been asked by the kids over the years. We started with a list of over fifty questions and whittled it down based on the stories we felt would best resonate with a broad audience.
Ken: What do you hope that parents and educators will learn by reading this book?
Siva: Different parents and educators will likely have a whole continuum of takeaways based on their own life experiences and that’s exactly as it should be. If nothing else, hopefully all can gain an appreciation of the power of child-led learning and asking thoughtful questions that empower children to take the lead.
Aarti: I don’t think I was formally introduced to the concept of child-led learning until I met Siva. While elements of it were always present in my own childhood, I don’t think I ever approached it as intentionally as I do today. My hope for those reading is that this book inspires them to amplify their intentionality because most likely they’re already doing a lot of this.
Ken: Chess is referenced throughout this book.
What makes Chess such an interesting game for kids?
Siva: Chess education facilitates so many habits of mind that are helpful in all facets of life, including taking turns, patience, resilience, confidence, work-ethic, spatial reasoning, number sense, planning, and rational decision making under uncertainty.
Ken: Do you see Chess as a way of engaging your kids in a meaningful way that’s different from other hobbies?
Siva: The educational value, particularly in STEAM education, is significant. I’ve been teaching math for over 20 years. Every chess player I’ve ever worked with showed a confidence with problem solving, a willingness to lean into uncertainty and thoughtfully maneuver around roadblocks, as well as spatial reasoning, number sense, and planning skills beyond their years. Additionally, physical contact is a challenge for many kids and chess affords them a deep learning opportunity coupled with a competitive environment that many more conventional sports might not.
Aarti: Chess is unique in that it encourages reflection as part of the learning process. Moments of reflection are intentionally built in after every game. Players can go over games with their opponents, their coaches, and themselves. You don’t necessarily see this type of reflection in other sports/activities until you reach a much higher level, when you’re watching tape and really prepping for opponents. The fact that young kids can be exposed to this level of analysis and reflection is what makes chess such a powerful learning tool.
Ken: What are some common misconceptions about Chess that you’d like parents to know?
Siva: I think there’s a misconception out there that chess is only a game for the intellectually elite. I would argue that it’s a game for everyone to learn and witness transformative personal growth, intellectually and otherwise. I think part of it is the fact that at the end of each game, there’s a result, a win, loss, or draw, however it’s much less about that result than the growth mindset of learning the game and developing those critical habits of mind to keep improving as a learner and person.
Aarti: Chess has historically been a male dominated sport but it’s encouraging to see so many intentional opportunities for girls to thrive today.
Ken: Why do you think Chess parents/educators will enjoy this book?
Siva: I think they will see themselves and their kids in our experiences, particularly those around chess, and perhaps tweak their practices more toward a growth mindset in reading some of our stories. Hopefully they also see similar powerful takeaways in music, travel, and more that perhaps inspire them to give those a try too.
Aarti: There are many experiences we’ve highlighted in the book that likely extend to similar situations in the lives of chess parents and educators. We’ve had to tweak our approach for each of our children and acknowledging that each child has unique strengths and challenges and levels of readiness might be a freeing concept for others to read and explore in their own lives.
Ken: When you are at a Chess tournament or practicing chess with friends, how does it make you feel?
Vivaan: It feels really good. I can help other people get better while getting better myself. I also love making friends with all my opponents.
Sarang: Chess is super fun. I love making friends through chess and have fun with them and improve together. When I’m playing chess, I don’t think about anything else. I focus. I plan. I think deeply. It brings out the best in me.
Ken: Do your hobbies like (Chess, Music, Language, Math, Tennis, Travel) connect in some way?
Sarang: All my hobbies are a lot of fun and allow me to make friends through something we love. They all also involve a lot of planning and playing with patterns, which I’m really good at and enjoy.
Ken: For example, what do you think about the connection between Music and Chess?
Vivaan: Both are really fun and make me take my time. In drumming, I have to focus on patterns like bass, hat, snare hat. In chess, I have to focus on patterns like developing my pieces and keeping my king safe.
Ken: Tell me about the sections in the book called, Cost.
How did these sections of the book come about and what ideas were you trying to share with this material?
Siva: We acknowledge we’re fortunate. We have a roof over our heads, a loving family, time, and the means to engage in lots of learning experiences for our kids. We know that’s not the case for many. In the spirit of catering to all our readers, our hope with this section in each chapter was to share what it takes, to achieve the desired takeaways, and hopefully highlight that for many things, even with significant fiscal or time constraints, rewarding learning is achievable.
Aarti: The purpose of this section is to really articulate that no matter where you are in life, you can meaningfully apply these concepts. While Siva and I have had many differences in how were raised, we’ve both had the opportunity to experience facets of child-led learning in our own childhoods.
Ken: If you had a goal for this book to change the trajectory of education or parenting styles, what would it be?
Siva: A goal would be to grow appreciation for unconventional learning modalities outside of the traditional classroom setting.
Aarti: A goal would be to approach parenting and educating with more intentionality. People are very busy balancing busy careers and lives and we hope this book inspires people to grow and develop as parents given whatever constraints they may have.
Ken: When your friends or parents’ friends read this book, what do you think will surprise them the most?
Sarang: I think the way that the book is structured will surprise many. I also think the Resilience chapter about my first asthma attack will surprise people because it’s pretty different from the rest of the book.
Vivaan: I haven’t read any books where five-year-olds like me share their thoughts. I think that’s a fun surprise!
Ken: What did you learn about yourself during the process of writing this book?
Vivaan: I learned how much work it took to make a book. Sometimes it was tiring. I also learned that though I’m young, I have a lot to say and can really help my family.
Sarang: I learned through the process of writing this book that I am a good person who’s done a lot of neat things and that I can help others by sharing my experiences.
Ken: In your wildest dreams, who do you hope has an opportunity to read your book?
Siva: My Dad’s late father and my Mom’s late mother. Both were outstanding educators in their own way, and I think it’d be really cool to just see them again and talk shop, especially with how we’ve taken elements of their teaching approaches and adapted them to educating their great grand kids.
Aarti: Michelle Obama. She’s such an inspirational person and I’d love to have coffee with her and talk about raising kids.
Vivaan: Anyone who is having a hard time and looking for ideas on how to make things better.
Sarang: All my friends and family and everyone who knows me. Really anyone can read it. I hope it’s super helpful for parents with little kids looking for ideas.
Ken: In your book, the terms persistence, growth mindset and scaffolding are used a lot.
What do those terms mean to you on a personal level?
Sarang: To me, persistence means working hard in chess, music, tennis, and more. Growth mindset to me is focusing more on the process of learning. The results don’t matter. Actually they do but the process is more important and if you work hard you’ll get better results. Scaffolding to me refers to how much direction and help you get. In my learning, I like to take the lead and don’t like as much scaffolding. When I was younger, I needed more scaffolding to learn the fundamentals.
Ken: Question for Sarang and Vivaan
In this book, the term child-led learning is referenced.
What does that term mean to you?
Sarang: Child-led learning is learning led by me. For example, I really wanted to learn Japanese so my parents provided the resources for me to do that. I wanted to code video games so my parents gave me the tools to do that. Even though they gave me the tools, I do the work and choose the direction I go in.
Ken: What new subjects fascinate you?
Sarang: Japanese, coding, chess, and music all fascinate me. Tennis has been a fun new thing to learn and master and I look forward to continuing to get better at it.
Vivaan: I’m excited to improve my writing, especially handwriting, and my chess and drumming.
Ken: What are you looking forward to happening as you begin to promote this book and your message about child-led learning?
Siva: As an educator, the thing that brings me the greatest joy is seeing those epiphanous “aha” moments in my students. I hope everyone who reads our book gets to experience at least one aha moment if not more for themselves and then empower aha moments for the kids in their lives.
Sarang: I’m looking forward to seeing how people engage with the book. It’s really neat to see the reviews and ratings and feedback. I also look forward to chatting with family and friends about my experiences.
Do Brown Cows Make Chocolate Milk?
Family Experiences Around Child-Led Learning
Published September 18, 2023
ISBN: 9798861158794
List Price: $18
Available through Amazon, Barnes and Noble and fine bookstores everywhere.
Fast forward to January 2025, I caught up with Siva (Dad) briefly to reflect on the journey since publication…
Ken: How is the book stimulating conversation in the community and what unexpected conversations have arisen?
Siva: The last fifteen months have been a whirlwind. We were fortunate to be able to share our stories at bookstores, schools, chess tournaments, and more, and the conversations that arose were incredible. Hearing how the book resonated with readers of all ages and helped facilitate fruitful and fun family experiences meant the world to us.
I was particularly struck by how powerful the book has been in the chess community, homeschooling community, and for families with neurodivergent kids, like ours. I’ve been amazed by how many people have reached out sharing struggles they’re facing relating with their kids, empowering their kids, and designing meaningful experiences for their kids. It’s wonderful to be able to share ideas and tailor advice to specific situations and struggles and see the transformative impact those suggestions can make.
For example, many chess families have reached out about how to navigate rating stagnation, lack of motivation, and how to rebound from the tough tournaments and challenging losses, and more broadly how to build that sense of resiliency that is critical to thrive in chess, not to mention life.
Parents with kids with various neurodivergent superpowers have had numerous conversations with us around reframing the narrative around “disorder” and “fixing” the challenges to leveraging strengths and offering opportunities for the superpowers to shine, rather than solely trying to converge to the norms of the neurotypical. Strategies to utilize these strengths to overcome the challenges have been a major point of emphasis as well.
This has perhaps been the most unexpected and simultaneously rewarding part. I think within the chess community, about half the players are fortunate to have some form of neurodivergence. See the narrative being reframed? It is the norm in a sense, and it is celebrated and that’s powerful. It’s particularly cool to see the mindset shift in parents from “oh no, my kid…” to “oh wow, my kid…”
As for the homeschooling community, it’s been amazing to see so many friends, old and new, chatting with me about pedagogy and ideas to tweak their practices to incorporate more experiential learning. Helping families see the intersectionality between chess education, music education, and travel schooling, with more traditional curricular pursuits has been wonderful.
Ken: What’s next?
Siva: We’re living life intentionally and running with child-led learning on the family front. Sarang is 11 and Vivaan is 7. They both continue to love chess and music and travel, and we’re doing our best to offer opportunities for productive growth and learning in all these facets. I think we’ve also embraced this idea of being ambassadors of child-led learning and we love having the many conversations we alluded to earlier.
One very neat thing that’s happening is Sarang and Vivaan have been working the last several months on a new book! It’s a collaboration with their chess and homeschool buddy Benji, designed to help new players, particularly kids, enter the world of tournament chess. It’s been incredible seeing how far they’ve come in their writing and ability to thoughtfully articulate their thoughts since their first book writing experience, and we can’t wait to share the new book with you, hopefully later in 2025!
For more information or to connect with Siva and his family about speaking opportunities, please contact sankrithibooks@gmail.com
