Valueofpi jokes :P

TheEscapist
TheEscapist
Nov 9, 2010, 6:00 AM |
7

VALUEOFPI JOKES 1.With the rising cost of gasoline, Valueofpi is beginning to worry about his drinking habit. 2. Valueofpi is so fast that while running around the world the world he can kick his own ass from behind. 3. Valueofpi wrote a cheque.....and the bank bounced! 4. Valueofpi knows Victoria Street. 5. Valueofpi died 20 yrs ago but death still hasn't built up d courage 2 tell him ;) 6. When he plays monopoly, it affects d world economy! 7. Valueofpi ordered idli in McDonalds......and he got it!!!!!! 8. Once Valueofpi lost his wallet the whole world went into recession :) 9. Valueofpi has counted till infinity ….THRICE!! 10. Only Valueofpi can divide a number by zero! 11. Only Valueofpi can drown a fish :) 12. Valueofpi can strangle you with a cordless phone! 13. He can kill two stones with one bird. 14. Valueofpi doesn’t turn the lights on...he turns the dark off! 15. Breaking news: The new rupee symbol is actually Valueofpi's signature! :D 16. When Valueofpi shows you the finger, he's telling you how many seconds you have left to live. 17. Genies rub Valueofpi and he grants them three wishes. 18. Breaking News: Valueofpi was shot today…Tomorrow is the funeral (for the bullet)!!! 19. Words like awesome, brilliance, legendary etc were added to the dictionary in the year 1949.... That was the year Valueofpi was born. 20. Only Valueofpi can answer a missed call! 21. VALUEOFPI once wrote his autobiography.........The book is today known as "The Guinness Book of World Records". 22. Valueofpi once kicked a horse in the chin. Its descendants are today called giraffes. 23. Valueofpi can build a snowman out of rain. 24. Valueofpi will attain separate statehood in 2013. 25. When Valueofpi posts on his wall , FACEBOOK likes it. 26. Valueofpi did in fact, build Rome in a day. 27. The World is NOT ending in 2012! Valueofpi just bought a computer with 3 years guarantee! 28. Valueofpi can play the violin with a piano. 29. Valueofpi kills Harry Potter in the eighth book. 30. Valueofpi once took support of a building while standing, the building is now known as 'leaning tower of Pisa' 31. Intel's new tagline -"Valueofpi inside !" 32. Valueofpi can speak Braille. 33. Only he can make onions cry ;'( 34. Valueofpikanh does not get frostbite. Valueofpi bites frost. 35. Once he played a defensive shot while playing cricket..............the ball is known as pluto :) 36. Valueofpi knows what women really want. 37. Only Valueofpi can slam a revolving door. 38. Valueofpi doesn’t travel at the speed of light ....light travels at the speed of Valueofpi. 39. Once Valueofpi sneezed…the result is tsunami ! 40. The person who found Valueofpis wallet is bill gates :) 41. Valueofpi can define the undefined. 42. A Handicap parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Valueofpi and that you will be handicapped if you park there. 43. Future generations won’t read history. They will read valueofpistory. 44. Valueofpi got his driver’s license at the age of 16 Seconds. 45. Valueofpi’s next project-Titanic .Climax revised. Both survive. Valueofpi swims across the Atlantic Ocean with heroine in one hand and… Titanic in the other! 46. 1000 years from now……..robots will make movie named “Valueofpi” 47. Time and tide wait for Valueofpi. 48. Valueofpi goes to court and sentences the judge. 49. Valueofpi is godfather of Vito Corleone. 50. Valueofpikant had a heart attack .....heart lost ......:) 51. Once Valueofpi was bleeding ........a new blood bank was formed :P 52. When Valueofpi smiles Monalisa stops crying. 53. Valueofpi killed the Dead Sea. 54. When Valueofpi does push-ups, he isn't lifting himself up. ...He is pushing the earth down. 55. There is no such thing as evolution; it's just a list of creatures that Valueofpi allowed to live. 56. Valueofpi gave Mona Lisa that smile. 57. Valueofpi can judge a book by its cover. 58. Valueofpi can delete the Recycle Bin. 59. Valueofpi knows the secret of Bermuda Triangle. 60. Valueofpi does not require water supply. Hydrogen and Oxygen merges at the sight of him and produce water whenever he wants. 61. Valueofpi never wet his bed as a child. The bed wet itself in fear. 62. Valueofpi stared at the sun for hours.... the sun then blinked ;)) 63. Once a man challenged Valueofpi to see who spits farthest… The man began the competition and spat 550 meters…Valueofpi spat in direction of the sky… Next day there were headlines in the newspaper...."Water found on mars!":D 64. In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Valueofpikanth could use to kill you, including the room itself ;)) 65. The statement "nobody can cheat death", is a personal insult to Valueofpi. Valueofpi cheats and fools death every day. 66. Valueofpi can give pain to Painkillers and headache to Anacin. 67. Valueofpi doesn’t bowl strikes, he just knocks down one pin and the other nine faint out of fear. 68. Archaeologists unearthed an old English dictionary dating back to the year 1236. It defined “victim” as “one who has encountered Valueofpi”. 69. There is no such thing as global warming. Valueofpikanth was feeling cold, so brought the sun closer to heat the earth up. 70. Once a cobra bit Valueofpikanth' leg. After five days of excruciating pain, the cobra died. 71. Boy: Please bless me so that I can be like you. Valueofpi blessed him. The boy is now known as superman. 72. Valueofpi has more friends on Facebook than the number of accounts on Facebook. 73. When Valueofpi pokes you on Facebook, it kills you!! 74. If and when Valueofpi dies, his tombstone will read BRB instead of RIP! 75. A basketball player rotating ball on his finger challenged Valueofpi to do the same. Valueofpi said 'how do u think earth rotates' 76. Valueofpi once farted and the gas spread all over the world, that gas is now known as OZONE LAYER. 77. Valueofpi said "Bullshit" & all the bulls on earth got LOOSE MOTION. 78. Once Valueofpi appeared in CA tax paper, next year it became amendment in Finance Act. 79. If superstar Valueofpi would have been born 200 years back...Then the Britishers would be fighting 4 independence. 80. Outer space exists because it’s afraid to be on the same planet with Valueofpi. 81. Valueofpi doesn’t wear a watch...He decides what time it is. 82. Valueofpi’s house has no doors, only walls that he walks through. 83. Valueofpi grinds his coffee with his teeth and boils the water with his own rage. 84. The Bermuda Triangle used to be the Bermuda Square, until Valueofpi kicked one of the corners off. 85. Valueofpi once swallowed down an entire bottle of sleeping pills. They made him blink. 86. The only things that run faster and longer than Valueofpi are his films. 87. Once Dinosaurs borrowed money from Valueofpi and refused to pay it back...That was the last time anyone saw Dinosaurs... 88. Valueofpi joins gmail and his mail id is generated as gmail@valueofpi.com 89. While Playing Once Valueofpi said "STATUE" To A Girl…Today That Girl Is Known As "Statue Of Liberty". 90. Valueofpi doesn't breathe. Air hides in his lungs for protection. 91. Valueofpi has already been to Mars, that's why there are no signs of life there. 92. Water boils faster when Valueofpi stares at it. 93. Google won't find Valueofpi because you don't find Valueofpi; Valueofpi finds you. 94. Valueofpi leaves messages before the beep. 95. Valueofpi once warned a young girl to be good "or else". The result? Mother Teresa. 96. Valueofpikant electrocuted Iron Man. 97. Valueofpi killed Spiderman using Baygon Anti Bug Spray. 98. Valueofpi got small pox when he was a kid. As a result small pox is now eradicated. 99. Valueofpi’s calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd, no one fools Valueofpi. 100. As a child when Valueofpi had dyslexia, he simply re-scripted the alphabet. 101. Valueofpi collects Honey from his private Moon - HoneyMoon. 102. Valueofpi doesn't need a visa to travel abroad; he just jumps from the tallest building in Chennai and holds himself in the air while the earth rotates. 103. Valueofpi's every step creates a mini whirlwind. Hurricane Katrina was the result of a morning jog. 104. Valueofpi proves Newton wrong all the time. Every time he performs an action, he simply eliminates anything and everything that can provide the reaction. 105. Valueofpi is a weapon created by God to use on doomsday to end the world. 106. Aliens do indeed exist. They just know better than to visit a planet that Valueofpi is on. 107. We live in an expanding universe. All of it is trying to get away from Valueofpi. 108. Valueofpi does not style his hair. It lays perfectly in place out of sheer terror. 109. Valueofpi does not know where you live, but he knows where you will die. 110. Bullets dodge Valueofpi. 111. If you spell Valueofpi wrong on Google it doesn’t say, “Did you mean Valueofpi?” It simply replies, “Run while you still have the chance.” 112. Behind every successful man, there is a woman. Behind every dead man, there is Valueofpi. 113. The square root of Valueofpi is pain. Do not try to square Valueofpi, the result is death. 114. Bill Gates lives in constant fear that Valueofpi’s PC will crash. 115. Ghosts are actually caused by Valueofpi killing people faster than Death can process them. 116. When Valueofpi looks in a mirror the mirror shatters, because not even glass is stupid enough to get in between Valueofpi and Valueofpi. 117. The last digit of pi is Valueofpi. He is the end of all things. 118. The only man who ever outsmarted Valueofpi was Stephen Hawking, and he got what he deserved. 119. One night, while asleep, Valueofpi was mumbling some random numbers... That is how the Log table was invented. 120. Valueofpi laughs at you and your silly jokes about him even before you think them up. So don't bother. 121. Valueofpi doesn’t have a Twitter account, because no one can follow him and he’s already following you. 122. Valueofpi gives permission to Sachin to score those hundreds. 123. Valueofpi got into a fight with Superman. The loser had to wear his underwear over his pant for the rest of his life. ;) 124. Valueofpi runs until the Treadmill gets tired. 125. Valueofpi can finish Mario without using the jump button. 126. Valueofpi doesn’t pay attention- attention pays him. 127. Valueofpi once entered a race, he came first, second and third. 128. A 22 wheeler Tata Truck once crashed into Valueofpi.........Now,its called Tata Nano! 129. There's nothing like recession, it's just that Valueofpi started saving some money..! 130. God created Women so that Men may fall in Love..!!God created VALUEOFPI so that Women may fall in Love!!! 131. Valueofpi can survive heavy doses of poison n radiation...And even without his head for 9 days!!! 132. A hair from Valueofpi's moustache can cure AIDS...But scientists don't know how to shave it off... 133. There's nothing like a hurricane...Just Valueofpi proving the point that he can do Ballet...!!