Elijah Logozar: "I forgot to exist"

Hey guys,

A few years ago I was extremely active as a chess improver. Some of you may remember me from my perpetual chess podcast interview or the Chessable courses I published, as well as influence from legendary adult improver David Milliern and his framework for improvement.

In recent years, my rating has fallen quite a lot, and I "fell off the map". Lots of people seem to be wondering where I went, and there really isn't a simple answer to this. Maybe the simplest explanation is that I forgot to exist and played chess by inertia while experimenting with flow states and what it "means to have a self" in a more meta way, while going through a personal crisis, which drained my energy and was also fascinating feedback/data for further experiments/learning.

It seems that I've 'found my way back' to "my subjective life" despite complications (long story), and quite a few misunderstandings to put it lightly, and now it's not clear what to prioritize. So many books to read, not to mention dozens of Chessable courses to finish/publish, possibly including videos... anyways, how to explain what I'm up to? Maybe that will come out easiest in context.

Cheers!

- the chess unicorn, elijah logozar