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The Tale Of The PRO League In One Sentence

The Tale Of The PRO League In One Sentence

Jan 13, 2017, 7:55 AM 12

My friend the Lion King, ever the grandiose Blockbuster Rockstar, told me, the Knight, in his usual Soprano voice, that despite usually just being a lowly Mechanic who Surfs the internet, to fulfill my Destiny "expect the enemy to fight like a Nomadic Direwolf with teeth as sharp as Stormbringers" and therefore I should Invent Dynamite, then use my Yoda Magic and my Gnomic stature to Gambit by laying in wait like a Cobra on a Tower only to become an Express Mover and come out from behind the Windmill to throw those sticks like a Hacker Penguin -- a Swashbuckling Blizzard of Snowballs, Raining down on the Dragons like a swarm of angry Mosquitos, not the size of Puffins or Cardinals or Sparrows, but instead like an Osprey with the nature of a ruthless Pawngrabber Ape, a Desperado Slugging for a Knockout, which will cause Kraken of their heads, giving them Migraines and slowing them to the speed of Leatherbacks, when I will celebrate becoming a Champion by eating Koeksisters and waiting to be promoted to Arch Bishop and for an official invitation to become a Chessbrah, as long as I take an oath not to become a Rat.

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