The Tournament That Made Me Quit Chess
Introduction
A few months ago, I played in a national youth championship. I went in expecting to get around a 50% score, as I was really underrated at 1242 CFC. However, at the end of the tournament, I had scored 1.5/7 and lost 70 rating points, putting me down to the 1100s. After that performance, I didn't pick up a chess piece again for months.
This is the story of the tournament that made me quit chess.
Game #1
Note: I've removed my name for my privacy, and I've also removed the names of my opponents for their privacy.
Of course, I probably wouldn't be able to beat a 1900/almost 2000-level player. However, I'm definitely disappointed with how little of a fight I put up here. I was worse right out of the opening and walked into a fork, losing in just 27 moves. This was not a great way to start off the tournament, but the worst is yet to come...
Game #2
I thought I was better in the early middlegame when I put all my pieces near the queenside. However, after the game, the engine told me that I was never better throughout the whole game! During the game, due to my overextending, I was under extreme time pressure for all of the late middlegame, which explains some of my terrible moves.
Game #3
Guess what? I was matched up against another lower-rated player, who was 1100. I can win this, right? Wrong. I got destroyed.
The Evans Gambit used to be my favourite gambit, and I used to score pretty well with it. However, for whatever reason, I played a really passive variation, which you can't do, because you're sacrificing a pawn to get your pieces active. Then, by playing 10. e5??, I lost the game. After the queen trade, I went into a much worse middlegame in which I was playing for only two results. My opponent made no mistakes (not too hard when I was playing like soggy cereal).
Game #4
Three games, three losses. However, in the 4th Game, I managed to win the game with an amazing performance! Just kidding, I lost again!
I think the opening situation sums up the whole tournament for me. I was so scared of losing that I played paranoid moves and ended up losing because of them. While I didn't play any huge one-move blunders, I played a series of inaccuracies that led to my loss.
Game #5
I won't sugarcoat anything - I lost again, this time to an 800-rated player!
That was one of the most embarrassing games I have ever played. Playing that awful Nxe5 move and getting crushed by an 800 CFC (about 700 USCF) player. However, this loss didn't hurt at all - I was glad to get out of that playing hall and I was especially glad to get out of the tournament. The previous games had numbed the agony of losing - put simply, I just didn't care anymore.
Tournament Result
The tournament result for me was 1.5/7, as I mentioned in the intro. It's my most disappointing tournament result ever! I did win a game and draw a game, but I thought seven games would be too many for the blog. Besides, showing a game I actually played well in would go agains the self-deprecating theme of the rest of the blog.
The short-term result? I felt awful, and I threw my scoresheets in the garbage (I dug them out a few days later, after the disappointment petered out). I lost a lot of rating too, and I didn't go through/analyze/annotate the games until I made this blog post, many months later.
The long-term result is that I lost interest in and took an extended break from classical chess. For a few weeks, I stopped playing chess and couldn't even think about chess. In short, the tournament performance really depressed me for quite a while.
However, I am playing in a classical tournament again on Saturday March 25th - the first OTB tournament since this disaster. I will definitely update you guys with a blog about it after the tournament ends!
Conclusion
Well, that's about it! It took me way too long to bounce back from this. But I did eventually start playing rapid games, got back into serious chess improvement, and even signed up for a classical tournament. Until I go 0-5 in my next tournament, thanks for reading the Daily Rat!
