Complacency: "Victory Has Defeated You"

There is a phenomenon that plagues me. That when victory strikes, I become complacent. My skills diminish; I no longer thirst for further progress. I lose my hunger.

I am certain that this attitude is not unique to myself. Somehow when victory is achieved or when we accomplish a great goal in life, we stop trying. We stop stretching.

"I have conquered the mountain. I have proven myself. Perhaps I have made 1000 ratings? Perhaps I have made 1200? Perhaps 1700, perhaps 2000, etc.? I don't need to go further. What is the point?"

I have seen this take place with fictional characters growing up. I thought it was just fiction, but as I matured, I really began to appreciate art and artistry. Even works of fiction give great insight into the human psyche. The intoxicating effects of victory are well captured in various works of fiction—it's as if artists have a deep intuitive understanding of human personality and cognitive tendencies.

Even the ancient philosophers warn us about the dangers of hubris. The notable stoic philosopher, Marcus Aurelius, warns, "Pride and outward show are arch-seducers of reason. When you think you’re occupied in the weightiest business, that’s when it has you in its spell.”

My younger years were shaped by Abrahamic traditions. A text worthy of note is a collection of Proverbs attributed to King Solomon. One proverb states, "Pride comes before a fall." So the wisest in our midst have known about the dangers of pride and complacency.

Indeed, being proud of having gone past a certain level can potentially lead to stagnation.

Drawing from my own experience, I no longer practice the same way I used to. I no longer have a journal of training. I no longer have a set number of puzzles that I must solve no matter how tired I feel—even if I get them all wrong. I am no longer as motivated to dig deep and find subtlety and novelty in openings and middlegames. I no longer have the initial passion for achieving mastery, clarity, and lucidity.

But how do I snap out of this? How do I get back on the path? How do I get that humility to recognize that there are still higher echelons of proficiency that exist? These are important questions to ask.

At the same time, when we push ourselves without meaning and purpose, we question our sanity.

But let me consider other questions. Is pushing myself further beyond worth it? What will I gain? Let me compare:

Pushing myself promises:

- I gain greater ability and proficiency.

- My understanding deepens.

- I snap out of excessive pride and indolence.

- I confront my fears.

- I grow

Not pushing myself:

- I avoid the truth.

- I avoid mistakes and pain.

- There is endless gloating and a self-congratulatory attitude.

- I become weaker.

- I become vain and hold on to essentially meaningless titles like "Number 1 in Legendary League," "Elite Puzzle Solver," "3300 Tactics Rating," "99.9% Percentile," and all of those silly trophies.

- I stop growing... I die in a metaphorical sense.

Growing is painful and irksome. Being proven wrong is not something most of us humans welcome. But everyone is wrong about something. That is the truth. Even the humble method of science and scientific progression throughout the centuries underscores this point.

I have to embrace error. I must be willing to lose continually. I must love losing. I have to embrace the truth. There is no shame in not being the best. There is no shame in making an attempt and having my ego take a hit.

This is all quite nice, but can I move into praxis? Will the old habits hinder me? For now this attitude of relaxing has surely become habitual and automatic. Well...we shall see. But the first step will be shunning perfectionism and beginning right away.

Finally, let me end this blog entry with Emanuel Lasker's quote:

"He who wants to educate himself in chess must evade what is dead in chess... the habit of playing with inferior opponents; the custom of avoiding difficult tasks; the weakness of uncritically taking over variations or rules discovered by others; the vanity that is self-sufficient; the incapacity for admitting mistakes; in brief, everything that leads to standstill or to anarchy."