How to Make Your Partner Mad?

How to Make Your Partner Mad?

Dec 17, 2016, 6:54 PM |

This is a brief tutorial on what to do if you really don't like your partner and you like losing.

1) Make a move when your partner told you to sit.

2) Tell your partner you know what you’re doing and you don't need his advice despite the fact he is 500+ points higher rated than you.

3) Keep asking him for pieces which don’t actually do anything – hey, you just like drops!

4) Keep wasting time trying to find some fancy 5-move combo because you feel there must be something forced, while your partner's opponent keeps moving lighting fast.

5) Sit for a piece when you are down time and also make sure it clearly isn't coming.

6) When your partner asks you for a piece, you ask him for a piece back and do a double sit until he gets you what you need.

7) Tell your partner after every loss it was his or her fault and he or she must play fast and safe.

8) Tell your partner you own your opponent every game but it’s his or her fault for losing, despite the fact you sacrificed half of your pieces to get some initiative, yet your partner should be expected to play fast and safe 3 pieces down.

9) Do a queen trade without checking his board. If he gets mated in one with the queen you know the drill – “Why are you playing so riskily?! I told you play quickly and safely!”

10) Keep playing until you get mated while your partner has mate in 1 and you are up time.

11) Don't get pieces for your partner – especially if he has mate in one. Instead, keep attacking yourself and demand pieces. It's even better to disregard all of what he says.

12) Keep playing very riskily even if you get mated in 15 moves every game. Luck might change.

13) If you partner makes a blunder, don't forget to tell him he is terrible and the only reason you won your games was because you were carrying his fat ass.

14) If you made a blunder and he tells you something, reply that you only blundered because you are forced to watch his board all the time to keep him alive.

15) If you are unhappy with something your partner did just resign the game right away.

16) Lose at least one game clearly on purpose.


Do all of these and test your partner. Bughouse is not for everyone.