The raft ventures

Dec 4, 2014, 10:41 AM |

You wake up in a raft and suddenly the turbulent waters shift.

You cry. "What the fuck am I doing here?"

That's when the white water starts pouring on top of you. There's a senslessness in it all. The water is not so much heavy as it is just crazy. It whips and turns around bends.

The raft in question is yellow  and even has a duck on the front. How'd it get here you pontificate. Whilst doing so a large ass Pirahanna leaps out of the water nipping at you. It wasn't really nip but a full on gnash. So you're fucking freaked right?

Well, the next thing you know  another raft is next to you named Rachel. Yep, she's an AI raft. And what's odder is she is a purple raft. You recognize what appears to be another duck. Yet, the Pirhannas's ignore this raft.

You realize you're in a raft simulator. LAME!

Yet, in an inception thingy or crazy ass dream you wake up.

You're now soaked in honey and about to be eaten by something. It wasn't the something you're afraid of. It was the honey because you're paraylzed.

You just blink and now you're in a matrixy reality with people staring at you like your nuts. The only thing with this reality is there all Grahm Crackers. What in the fuck?

Not the Pirahannas or the goddamn honey. You're stuck in your reality. Grahm Cracker reality and the very beautiful women are marshmallows?


You're shot into an alternate dimension where you're just a rock that can bounce up and down in a box. Is this reality?

You question with your rock brain. Then the real reality surfaces and you're in your mahogany-cherry wood bed in a mountain town. You get up from the previous encounters and wonder what being a rock or Grahm Cracker would be like . You wonder if you're home. There's no pawns or anything from Inception. There's just you in the room and your family wondering if your an empathetic weirdo. They urge you to dive out near the shoreline on a baking summer.

You know this reality to be true. There's beautiful and almost clear water. Scratch that it is a bluesish and green tint. Like Gatorade kind of.

You dive in and OH! SHIT! You're on a boat floating in the Baltic. You're catching fish with Hashmeer.
You crazy fucker you had just been dreaming. What a lout!

Then you go to sleep and without're a carrot. Your reality is a carrot. You had all the dreams a carrot could have. You're sleeping in a dirt covered field underground. You can hear a farmer saying, "These are my pride and joy." 

This is your reality. You're a fucking carrot. An orange thing that people eat. You're subdued by your own carrot thoughts and foriegn to the world.

Oh well at least you're a goddamn carrot!


Happy reading travelers and audience.What is really concieved as reality?

Are we carrots or something more? :)