Cheesipedia: Cheesy’s Definition of Chess Terms

Cheesipedia: Cheesy’s Definition of Chess Terms

enoughwiththeblues
enoughwiththeblues
Apr 27, 2012, 8:42 PM |
2

Here's the definition of Cheesy of how chess terms makes sense to him (I am in no way responsible for this, honest). He just figure things out himself free from outside interventions. Supplementary infos are given as necessary.

Royal Fork- (v.)  is a condition when the king have to decide who between him and his wife is more important. And decided, hm, of course me. Am out of here, dear.

Any other fork- (v. adj.) is a condition where the king decides who among his other “officials” to sacrifice next.

En passant-(v.) King to his opponent: “there goes my other wife. I would be really scared if I were you”.

King- (n.) a chess piece who represents all the powerful man in the world. Bravery is encouraged until it’s his life at stake.

Queen- (n.) is a confused woman.

Pale Bishop-(adj.)  is a man who tells his people to go right, then goes left himself. 

Dark Bishop-(adj.)  is  pale bishop unable to hide his true intentions.

Pawn-(n.)  is a queen in the making.

A double attack- (v.) is covert operation at work.

An open check- (v.) is a hostage drama.

Grand Master-(n.)  is a master that is grand, with whom any other chess player (still not grand) would be proud losing to. 

Castling-(v.)  is a king gone hiding.

A sacrifice- (n.) is giving off something important in exchange for a desired position. As long as it’s not the king himself, then your on the right tract.

A threat- (n.) is mutual understanding on things. Never threat a person who is not even aware that something bad is going to happen. Hm.

Number One- (n.)  is a pretentious bug who got it bad for me without even knowing it.

The Author of this blog- (unknown) is a confused woman who pretend I exist and talks to me often when confused. Poor her.

A Chess Buddy-(n.)  is someone who would dare tell you your game is lousy when everybody else pretend it’s amazing and risk getting block from your chess.com account.

A chess notation- (n.) is a way to confuse the non-chessing public.

A knight- (n.) is a horse who overthrows his rider. 

Neat win- (adj.) is win that is neat.

Dirty win- (adj.) is a win that is dirty.

Accident win- (adj.) is an unconscious victory (with the expression, ow, whatever happen back there). Let’s do it again. And then you got beat.

Blunder- (n.) is a hypothesis gone wrong. Therefore, unwise guess.

Mistake- (n.) is always wrong.

Cheating opponent- (n.) is someone you lose to when you are quite convinced that it is you who should have won.

Rating- (n.) is a number beside your name that either fools you or your opponent.

Zwigwang- (n.) (or maybe wigwam) is a term in chess that I have forgotten the meaning of. I don’t even  know the spelling. But still sounds good. Hm. Hahahahaha