Time for chess

Nov 15, 2007, 1:19 AM |

I have been asked many a time how I make time for chess with five kids. One person ridiculed me saying that 'only a very bad father would keep up this kind of time on a chess site while neglecting his duties as a husband and father.'

Aha, I have them here... I am not being a neglectful husband, nor a neglectful father... I am being a neglectful employee.

My opponents can attest to the fact that my moves are much more frequent nearing the end of the week than the beginning. This is because my work-week is concentrated near the end, and I am mostly off and at home (and NOT playing chess) nearer to the beginning.

So Touche you name callers and nay-sayers... you have misaccused my neglectful nature. Not to worry, my kids will grow up healthy and of sound mind knowing their father loved them. My clientele on the other hand, they may develop nervous ticks... and require therapy. Your tax payers' dollars can pick up their bills.

I am of course doing my duty, teaching my children chess... and steering them clear of the evils of the french opening.

Though I am hitting some resistance in the form of my children's maternal influence. She believes game night should be a more well-rounded experience. "Chess" as she is noted to say "is not a family game".

Video games of course are out because "they teach apathy, and are too violent". Card games may lead them to playing small stakes poker with their friends... which of course would lead to bigger stakes.. and then to "parents' stakes" poker. Nobody wants that.

Scrabble.. yes scrabble. The English Language. No harm there right... we sat down for a harmless game of familial scrabble.

My wife and I put down words and my two sons usually added 's' and 'ed' to our words. If they didn't have an 's' or 'e' and 'd' combination.. they'd usually just pass.

Then on his turn my 9 year old's eyes lit up. He wanted to work off a 'w' that my wife had played. He laid down an 'o', and then another 'o'. 'Woo'.

My wife says "That isn't a word". I laughed, "It sure is..."

My wife challenged our 9 year old and said "Use it in a sentence."

He smiled and said "I am good at Wooing women."

Hmmm... double word score... nice play son.

Next up.. my 12 year old who couldn't stop giggling. He plays the word 'Ass'.

My wife objected, but I pulled up the word on dictionary.com. Double letter score, 4 points bud.

Next time around my 9 year old lays the word 'rub'. My twelve year old adds 'ber' on the end. My wife and I are trying to keep straight faces, when my 9 year old says "use that word in a sentence."

I couldn't get to him in time. He used it successfully in a sentence, and the game ended abruptly.

I think we're back to chess as normal this week!!!

Back to being a good Dad.