3 Month Progress
3 MONTH PROGRESS REPORT:
LACK OF COURAGE: This was one of my two biggest self-identified challenges. I believe this was in part due some sort of inner demonizing of my opponents and myself whenever I lost. When I play a game (chess or otherwise), there is a tendency to intermingle my ego with the game. In this mindset, losing represents an existential threat. Starting a game gives my opponent paired my own lack of skill, concentration, experience, etc. an opportunity to end me. I have countered this in 2 ways:
1. I began purposefully viewing my opponents as fellow humans going through the same roller-coaster of emotions and focus and cognitive sharpness as I am. We are all just trying to get better at this thing and we need each other playing at our best to do so. In this new state of mind, I am appreciative of a good game. I will sincerely encourage an opponent who has just blundered to regroup and attack. I will compliment my opponents on what I think are nice moves (if you play me and I offer friendly chat, I am not trying to play head games -- I legit want the best game you can muster and for you to get the most out of the experience -- I also try to be careful not to deliver spoilers). It's been an amazing thing. When I am behind in an end game I even find myself rooting for my opponent to find a checkmate! This has completely altered my view and is making even my worst of games enjoyable 
2. I began making friends here. It hurts a lot less when I lose to someone I "know". Thank you to those I have friended so far and I look forward to finding others who find this type of play enjoyable.
PERFECTIONISM: I have come to an understanding that the perfect game does not exist. My errors are a part of play and I learn from them. A BIG help has been listening to The Perpetual Chess Podcast hosted by Ben Johnson. In particular, his "Adult Improver" series is full of great tips and pointers and offers a reality check on the hunt for perfectionism. We're all just trying to get a little bit better.
By the way, one of Ben's recent guests, IM Sean Nagle, recommended the book The Inner Game of Tennis: The Classic Guide to the Mental Side of Peak Performance (yes, "tennis", not "chess"). I purchased the audiobook straight away and it is a wonderful piece of work for helping to understand how we get in our own way and how to change our mindset to being more productive learners.
MY CURRENT IMPROVEMENT PLAN
I have changed the word "training" to "improvement" since it has become clear that getting better at chess will require a more holistic approach for me.
GET GOOD SLEEP: This is my new #1. Ever wonder why some days you play so much better than others? This might be the ticket to more consistent solid play. When I get the right amount of good sleep I have noticed my tactics are an order of magnitude better. As part of this, I had to give up my nightly wine (arrrrggggh!!). If there is a secret weapon, proper sleep is it!
TACTICS: I am tossing aside goals regarding quantity or chess.com tactics score improvement. I need to do as many puzzles as I can tolerate and work on maintaining focus and exploring many lines. GET 'EM RIGHT!
OPENINGS: I am still interested in openings, even though it is probably not the best application of my time at this level. They are fun, though, and learning the concepts behind them is kind of cool. I went ahead and got a Pro account at chessable.com and am learning and practicing every day. My goal with openings remains unchanged: learn common openings to avoid early trouble and understand when it's not as bad as it seems.
MY BIGGEST OBSTACLE RIGHT NOW (AS I SEE IT)
VISION: I am having trouble practicing. The idea of "blindfold" chess seems tortuous. Studying names of squares is boring. As a result, I avoid working on vision and have been counting on picking it up through osmosis. That's a bad strategy and I know it.
SOME FINAL NOTES
I am ever more appreciative of the chess community and those who challenge me and make me a better player. Thank you!!!
