How to Play Like Me: 101

May 1, 2014, 11:31 AM |

There's got to be some reason why I'm rated 1800 USCF. Some might consider that to be on the "high" side, but honestly, sometimes I don't feel like I deserve to be rated that "high". For one thing, I've never even drawn a 2000 player! In fact, my record is 0-0-21 against players rated 2000 or more! I will start a series of blogs on that in a little while, but for now, I'm going to analyze my own playing style. Here are a few tips if you want to learn how to play like me!



1. Spend lots of time.

2. Calculate anything and everything, even lines that won't ever happen! When you calculate, always remember to overlook one or two details about the position!

3. Never play for a draw, unless it's against someone much higher rated, and when you do, be sure to play timidly and passively!

4. Always be "afraid" of equal endgames. When you're up a pawn in the middlegame, always try to force some advantage/mistake from your opponent. Don't just "trade down" into an endgame. Always be very worried that being up a pawn with your opponent having no compensation is probably almost always still going to be a draw!

5. Spend around 20-30 minutes calculating lines that aren't forced, in the hopes of trying to get an advantage out of a completely equal postion.

6. When you finally DO get an advantage, perhaps a big one, spend another 24 minutes trying to find the "cleanest" win, in the fewest number of moves if possible.

7. When you play against someone rated 2000 or more, always remember that they are very strong and can read your mind. If they're over 2200, keep in mind that they can also read your every past thought! They will know even your darkest secrets and fears! When you play against these players, realize that they will always find a way to defeat you, no matter what and how you play! Because they're higher rated.

8.When you play against players rated 1500 or lower, always be happy, because a win for you is inevitable! Just play random moves trying to tempt them into making a mistake. Because they will and you will win! There is no reason to try hard against these players, because you are higher rated! :D

9. You know how to play every clearly-winning position! You just need to spend about 5-8 minutes on each move. When every normal player will just trade into an endgame up a knight, you will look really hard and easily find a move that wins an exchange! Although it might take you 10 minutes when there are only 13 minutes left on your clock, and your opponent still has 57 minutes.

10. Be overly aggressive against weaker players (those rated 18 points below you or more)!

11. Always make moves that create petty threats that are easily dealt with, instead of making moves to improve your postion or accomplish your long-term plan!

12. Never miss a tactic! If you think there might be one, be sure to spend a good 30 minutes trying to find it! It's better to blunder something in time trouble later than miss an immediate win when you already have an advantage!

13. Always, ALWAYS overestimate your position! Play moves as though you have an advantage when you really you don't!

14. Always play for the attack! When your opponent has already blundered the exchange, in an opposite-side castling position, your job is to attack the king and create complications! This is for sure the best way to win!

15. When you have a good position against someone higher rated, be sure to blunder it away unexpectedly! When you blunder, it's also advised that you undouble your opponent's pawns and allow him to win even more easily! ;)

16. Never settle for a "boring" position. YAWN! Chess isn't worth playing if the position is boring! Always strive to make unnessesary complications. It's better to have an exciting position that is probably inferior than to have a very bland equal position. But always remember to calculate a lot before making the first complicating move. Spend about 10-15 minutes or so AT LEAST, just to make sure it isn't losing a piece to a tactic.

How do YOU play chess? Post it in the comments below vvvv. In return, I will comment on a few of your blog posts and/or maybe give you a shoutout on a future blog post of mine! :D

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