I meant "going after him" in here, and yes I have.
Just disengage, and thus ignore such a person. It's the only peaceful way to deal with someone whose objective it is to manufacture drama and cause an emotional response. If you give in and provide them with such a reaction, they win.
Oka was active 10 years ago...
you know what i mean bruh
I meant "going after him" in here, and yes I have.
Just disengage, and thus ignore such a person. It's the only peaceful way to deal with someone whose objective it is to manufacture drama and cause an emotional response. If you give in and provide them with such a reaction, they win.
and you agree with him? OMEGALUL
Oka was active 10 years ago...
you know what i mean bruh
Uh ok
Sweetie when people get grumpy like that you can just offer hugs and hopefully it makes them feel all better but sometimes they no like it the hugs and go to the husband and sometimes Human Resources. But that's ok I no going to shout at them bad words myself. Just be happy with them and smile
I am saying it doesn't matter what they say, just ignore it. By engaging you just enable such a person and aid them in manufacturing drama, which ultimately hurts the community.
Disengaging is the most successful non-violent conflict resolution technique in all scenarios.
Lol sure, hugs are always an option.
But we have to face reality and recognize that there will always be inherently toxic people that don't respond to reason, evidence and not even hugs....
In these cases you just have to disengage and move on, or run risk of enabling them.
I think a lot of this has to do with personal issues, frustration and just bitter life experiences. Like no matter what you say or do, they'll simply never change until they're in the ground.
Very interesting - I don't think I've ever had this problem. All the people here on chess.com that have challenged me, like Ripley for example - I misspelled a French word and she questioned that, I corrected myself, we both moved on nothing else to see. OmShruti is so nice and sweet but yet she seems to "engage," as the word you like to use to the very same members that I have no problem with.
I think that GMproposed hit the nail on the head - and Hambuger (as Igotmange and myself so sweetly like to call him) and all both agree that people can just have a bad day.
Outside of chess.com - going into real life now - had a young lady come into the store I work in, wanted to buy very expensive things and such and then suddenly burst out into tears - she told me her boyfriend cheated on her - and - trying to get this thing back on topic - the hugs had helped her, a little bit.
So whenever someone is having a bad day, perhaps a hug can make it better. Even if it's a little bit.
I like your approach. I think you are an optimist, which is rare nowadays and a testament of your sweet personality.
We need people like you to balance us with such unconditional kindness, a noble quality.
I consider myself a realist. I am always open to a potentially positive outcome, but I also recognize the likelihood of that simply not happening.
Regarding the forums, I think 98% mean well and 99% of all conflicts are based in misunderstandings.
I'd rather be at peace than be right. It appears that many people take offense to just plain humor, as well. Ripley, Autobunny, Itude, are only just a few that I can think of that have gotten me to laugh out loud. It's not that their posts are offensive, or "trolling," but just questioning, fact-checking, or just out right hilarious. That right there can start, an engagement; when the forum doesn't understand the humor Don't blame them people, blame yourselves.
Totally agree with you Colby. People just misunderstand.
First of all GM, we have to look at why the comments are made in the first place. You know I have been wrong on many, many, occasions - this is why I was recently muted. All I had to do, was understand what was going on oh!!! Yes, I was wrong. OK. Got it. Moving on.
If you encounter ad hominem attacks, then please just ignore the person. Don't retaliate and don't argue with them. Just simply say, "I'm out". That will immediately shine a light on what they have done, diffuse the situation and allow you to remain calm. Trust me, this technique is very powerful.
If you feel that you wanna try arguing then just stick to the facts. Don't insult them back and don't acknowledge the fact that they insulted you. Just ask them if they also have an actual point to make.
That's another technique, but far less successful.
@Colby-Covington I talked with you and found that you were always polite with me whenever my opinion was different with your thoughts so just i want to appreciate your way of writing on forums because it is really better sometimes.
I appreciate that, thank you.
That's what it's all about, respecting each other's different opinions and trying to find similarities to build on. It's moments like these that define the purpose of this topic. Thanks again, for making that happen.
Exactly! Two great posts! 👍
Colby, I told the forum before that OmShruti is very sweet and kind and has always made me happy always. But then again, who takes a cartoon serious, anyway?
But to get back with you on what questions you should ask about community clean up, is...directed at the forum :
1. Hi. My name is Colby and I'm interested in cleaning up the community, getting rid of angry trolls, and making people happy with smiles and such. How do you suppose I go about doing this?
2. The reason I want to clean up the community is because I am a kind, loving, Colby. I care about the people who the feelings that the trolls are hurting. Do you have any suggestions on how I can go about accomplishing such a feat.
Now, I'll allow the forum, if they choose to do so, to interject some questions or Ideas on what to do. And, behold!!! No need to start a new thread, because, it's basically on topic with the current thread already. Besides, This thread has already drawn the attention of who knows how many chess.com members!!
😂 this is great 👍
I like your approach. I think you are an optimist, which is rare nowadays and a testament of your sweet personality.
We need people like you to balance us with such unconditional kindness, a noble quality.
I consider myself a realist. I am always open to a potentially positive outcome, but I also recognize the likelihood of that simply not happening.
Regarding the forums, I think 98% mean well and 99% of all conflicts are based in misunderstandings.
Optimism is great and we need more in chess.com! Yes a lot of conflicts are from misunderstandings but a lot is from negativity also
Yes.... and the movement here is to wipe entirely out all negativity that never is needed. Sure, it’s going to take a bit of time, but day by day we can make it a reality as best as each day our efforts provide! “,
Yes.... and the movement here is to wipe entirely out all negativity that never is needed. Sure, it’s going to take a bit of time, but day by day we can make it a reality as best as each day our efforts provide! “,
YES!!
Oka was active 10 years ago...