Imaginary chess books: a wish list

P64X: Extreme Workout for Positional Players

The Design, Care, Fine Tuning  and Beautification of Chess Pieces by Howard Staunton

Thank You for Nothing by Paul Morphy

CheckWow! by Vince (Tyson) Shlomi

Chess for Donkeys by Jeremy Silman.

Yeah, we've had Chess for Tigers, Chess for Zebras... How about Chess for Sloths?

My Attention Deficit/Hypermodern Disorder System - Nimzowitsch 

You Too Can Make It Big Writing Hundreds of Chess Books (Foreword by Tony Miles), 8th Edition by Eric A. Schiller

Unorthodox Chess Endings (UCE)

The Silence of the Pawns by Hans Schmuck

Have You or a Loved One Got Mesothelioma Playing Chess? by a Bunch of Useless Lawyers

All work and no play makes Claude a dull boy. All work and no play makes claude a dull boy. All work and no play makes Clade a dull boy. All work and no play makes Claude a dull boy. All work and noo play makes Claude a dull boy. All work and no play makes Claude a dull  bboy. All work and no play makes Claude a dull boy. All work and no play makea Claude a dull boy. All work and no play makes Claude a dull boy. All work and no pllay makes Claude a dull boy. All work and no play makes Claude a dulll boy. all work and no play makes Claude a dull boy. All work and n play makes Claude a dull boy. All work and no play makes Claude a dull boy. All work and no play makes Claude a dull boy. All work and no play makes Claude a dull boy. All work and no play makes Claude a dull boy. Al work and no play makes Claude a dull boy. All work and no play make Claude a dull boy.

by Bloodgood

24. You, too, Can Make it Big Writing Hundreds of Chess Books, 9th Ed., Foreword by Tony Miles, Written by Eric Schiller and Bruce Pandolfini, Ghostwritten by Fred Reinfeld and Irving Chernev

25. My Games on the Internet Chess Club - Bobby Fischer

Who is BoobyFischer? by Bobby Fischer

My Best Student Became a Handpusher by Bruce Pandolfini

Solving chess with the Smith-Morra gambit.

Strategically Position by Kurokug

Are you sure that he is qualified to write that book already?

Maybe it should be:

26. Strategically Position for Kurokug editted by BorgQueen

I had that book but I never finished it.

You, too? I found myself hanging my pieces on several problems and taking days with visualization training before I have the urge to even move. In the end I tend to find myself in dangerous time trouble.

I just realized the perfect counter for the Sloth technique:

27. Force your Opponents to Play Chess for Sloths

The only downside is that you might die of boredom OTB.

Chess Tournament Zoo by anyone who ever participated in an OTB tournament

P.S. Anyone play this guy?

According to chess history, Paul Morphy waited on an opponent for two hours to make a move. When Morphy courteously reminded the person that he had not decided on his next move for quite a while, his opponent exclaimed, "Oh, I thought it was YOUR turn to move!"

Hence, the chess clock became an integral part of competitive chess.

That made me fall out of the chair! The funniest moment of the day!

I know that my ignorance will kill it, but can someone please explain the joke that I clearly missed?

Was it because of Krush's ungraceful exit from a blitz loss?

Krush swats her king right off the board onto the floor, says "Oh, come on!" and then storms away from the board.  I believe that when you resign a game, you are supposed to shake your opponent's hand or say "good game" or some such.