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i think memorizing is hard but not pointless, because say were playing a 1800 who has not studied opening against a 1600 who has, the 1600 will have a much better beginning strategy and will probly gain an advantage
That notion is incorret. It stems from the belief that in 1600-1800 level mere opening advantages are important.
All games in that level are decided by a varying number of blunders by one or both players.
Actually, at 2100, most games have a couple of blunders big enough as to make the opening stage meaningless, even if at least there it's not always the case, and at least sometimes you actually make it count (and not once in a blue moon).
The reasons many people prefer to invest more time in that stage of the game than they should (definitely when compared to other, more helpful, stages), and try to convince themselves it is THAT thing that helps them improve, have a lot to do with comfort, laziness, and lack of self confidence.
It may seem daunting to learn all those lines... But, at least they're there for the learning... discovered and checked by a "higher authority", all you have to do is pick up what somebody else left behind... at least you KNOW what you have to do and your results have already been tested.
Other stages require you to really work your mind hard, and to (god forbid) make countles mistakes in the process of learning. THAT requires self confidence, and a willingness to work away from the heart of your "comfort zone" (which is the thing/s you already know/have a good grasp of).