A newbie thanking little trolls

The words of a cute confused duckie, plus private messages from other members and even more words from offline friends, made me change my point of view about past events.

One of the lessons learnt: before embarking yourself into a big project, first gather all information about it. Opening first a forum about how to get a trustworthy proof of getting a draw vs stockfish should have being one of the first steps.

For those who don't know what happened, they can visit the forum "A Newbie drew Stockfish at highest level (2 draws so far)". That forum was sabotaged by "forum trolls".

At the beginning I thought I wasn't going to be able to get a draw, so I kept writing in the forum thinking that it would be a discussion about human vs machine challenges, suggestions about strategies to follow... etc.

Maybe it didn't become so because I didn't explain that clear enough, it looked more like a display of the games. I was writing these other purposes in messages, but people skipped them and didn't read those other purposes of the forum. I even asked if people knew how the authenticity of the games could be checked a posteriori with software, to proof I'm a human and the other side is a machine, but nobody answered and that made me taking it for granted that such software existed. I should have written that question in big characters as the main question so that people don't skip it.

Another mistake was to be writing in a way full of jokes (just because I always have a good sense of humour) and then, right after posting the draw games, expect serious conversation. If an event has a serious character, it should be serious from the beginning. Partly It happened this way because I didn't know I would draw in the end.

The logical part of me told me to win or draw vs stockfish was impossible, but another part of me told me it was possible. At the beginning I believed more the impossible side of me, so I didn't bother to properly go through the right first steps of such a project (I even didn't know what was the "contempt" setting). But when I got that endgame (king and two pawns vs king)... oohhh my... I started to strongly believe that possible side of me and I tried harder.

I posted some of my lost matches hoping to learn how to keep going, to learn from failure.

I didn't know I was going to be able to actually get those draws vs stockfish, and I knew that loss after loss at least I was improving my chess with so much visualization training (even though losing repeatedly and repeatedly was very demoralizing on the other hand).

When I got the first draw nine months later, I almost couldn't believe it myself. I shouldn't have posted the game, I should have empathized more and understand that other people wouldn't believe it. But I thought posterior software analysis could provide a trustworthy proof, so I posted the games. Now I know that was a mistake.

It was a big effort directed in a wrong direction and these trolls sabotaging the forum stopped me from keep going in that wrong direction.

Even though it's benefitial the final result, it would have being nicer, faster, more effective, and not a waste of time, if someone explains to me all this wrong direction from the beginning, instead of all the negative disgusting process we've gone through. But it's ok, that's the way trolls are, we have to accept the character of these little trolls and live with it. I'll take with me the positive side of it.

There was almost no feedback from other members, so from the beginning I thought almost nobody believed in it or even cared about the forum. But the project was improving my chess, and that's the reason I kept going. It was such an unbelievable project, that people thought I was a troll myself and the forum was fake (my pirate flag avatar also didn't help in providing credibility). As a result, I took this seed of thoughts to device a revenge against these saboteur trolls.

After the forum was sabbotaged I learnt what a "forum troll" is on a wikipedia page. I learnt on other websites also how to avoid them, etc. But it was too late, the forum was already locked. So, the uppermost thought in my mind was revenge (nine months project gone to the trash in a disgusting and bad taste way). Subsequently, making them to believe all my next lies, to make them believe I am what I am not, and to make them waste their time the same way they made me waste my time was enough revenge for me. I feel satisfied and I'm done with it.

It was interesting to learn how trolls act, what turntable is, etc. Even though I don't think is a very useful knowledge, I find it interesting. It's just another type of game.

Still people will not believe those human vs stockfish games I posted are true. It's ok, I'm happy thinking nobody believes it. That's the normal expected reaction. Because the project was helping me to improve my chess, now I will keep going with it on my own, not posting here the process.

I have being discussing and pondering with offline friends about finding a way to record a set of videos that can be a trustworthy proof of the next games played (configuration, contempt value, strength value, the machine and humans moves made... etc. everything video recorded as a trustworthy proof). So far we didn't find a way to do it and we are still thinking how that could be possible. Anyways, maybe I'm not going to be able to get another draw in the rest of my life, who knows? One thing is for sure, trying to do it is improving my chess, and I feel relaxed and happy when doing it.

I have changed my avatar picture as a renewal symbol. After 7 years wearing the pirate flag I changed it to an image that somehow inspires me a relaxing feeling.

Sometimes I think the purpose of life is about regeneration and renewal. Reskin. The way to go forward.

I think chess would be a waste of time if it wouldn't teach us something that has a value outside of the chessboard. That's the reason I keep playing.

Now I'll do something crazy, I will unblock and release all those little trolls. Now they can insult me and sabotage this forum aaall they want. It's all theirs. Sometimes they insult in a funny way and can actually be amusing, like a jester. They can play their game until they get tired, I don't care. I will feel good despite of accepting people have inside all that negativity.

(However, if one day I write another serious forum, I'll block them from the begining).

Thank you little trolls for stopping a project going in a wrong direction.

Who is going to read all that?

Lo bueno, si breve, dos veces bueno; y aun lo malo, si poco, no tan malo. -Baltasar Gracián

I read books but skipped all of that

still great effort

I'm with you ATV! 😁

Para mí lo bueno, cuanto más tiempo dure, mucho mejor.

[Yo mismo]