When to resign - Etiquette - An honest appeal

wait, you're @master49er? weren't you like 2300 bullet or something, or am I just confusing you with someone else.

edit: nvm i think i am 

 Maybe next weekend if it fits your schedule.

Yea I was @Master49er and I changed my username

But I was never 2300 bullet

@wornaki sure

Yeah, I confused you with someone else.

The other day I came up short after a bloody exchange, realizing I'd lost posted a chat saying, "My next move will be one of desperation." He got the joke, I then threw away my last rook and resigned. Thought that was a friendly if not comical way to end a game. Just saying.

Very sporting, and there should be more of it. Frankly, it is not de rigueur to resign any more given the patchy nature of general Chess abilities today.

It's part of the game. I'm also around 1200 (rapid but still whatever) and resign in losing endgames or when I make huge blunders when I'm out of tricks, and I also get annoyed when people refuse to resign but there is nothing to do to stop it. It is part of the game. And, you never know, you might be facing that person who can't mate with king and rook vs. king or they could stalemate, no matter what it is possible. 

I was close to resigning in a game the other day, but I had a feeling he wouldn't be able to mate with queen and rook - and I was right, ended up a stalemate and a draw. 

If people want to play out losing positions, let them. If I am in a clear winning position then I can just cruise control to the end because I have studied endgames and know how to finish them, as any good chess player should. I recently blundered a bishop in a game, but refused to give up and in the endgame outplayed my opponent. It all comes down to the opponent and especially in I'd say 1700 or lower people can blunder winning positions fairly easy, which is another reason to just play on.

unrated game, but i got swindled so hard lol. (i had seconds left but still)

I think my only contribution to this thread is that I consider the original post's logic flawed in a different way: You assume that people will build habits from blitz chess online as beginner that will lead to bad behaviors in OTB chess at longer time controls.  I see a couple of issues with that. 

First, I don't think the general wisdom I've received as a beginner (even my low rating is inflated; I only play with my also-novice friends right now) is that blitz is a good way to learn in the first place.  So if I were concerned about beginners' behaviors and habits, I would tell them not to play blitz at all for the time being. I would tell them what I've been told -- play longer time controls and analyze my games.

Second, online vs. OTB you said yourself is a big difference.  I'm not sure there's evidence (not anecdotes, evidence) that people doing the things you consider disrespectful in online blitz translates into similar behaviors in person.  Given people's behavior in online forums, other sorts of online games, social media, etc. it seems pretty typical for people to act and talk more harshly than they dare in person. 

Finally, I think behaviors of what is appropriate are also different and part of the game in different time controls.  Why would I resign in a 5 minute game?  It's literally not worth another 60-90 seconds just to see what happens?  Maybe I'm wrong about the position?  Maybe I don't want to take the time to calculate whether it's a "lost" position when I might have a fighting chance if I just keep making moves?  In longer time controls I would resign if I was fairly confident because it's more likely I'd have done the evaluation properly to discern if I was correct. 

Just my thoughts on it.  It would never occur to me that someone would consider me disrespectful of them for taking up 1-2minutes to finish a game.  I'd feel silly for not letting them carry out their mate if they are going to, honestly!  But my friends and I are so basic right now just making moves is worthwhile!

As a fellow adult beginner I can only say I try to approach every player with great humility as they are either superior to me and I can learn from them, or they are worse than I am and God help them.

That was well put

I had this conversation with a friend of mine, he was telling me that he was in a tourney with 3 day per move time controls.

He tells me that he had a position in which it was a combination of three forced moves that lead to checkmate.

Well, since it was 3 days per move. He had to wait 9 days to finish the game.

I personally think that opponent is an (expletive) and there's no reason and or justification for that.

Well surely in this case the opponent was at fault. But you can't expect the same in blitz.

Regardless of time controls, I get that there are positions in which holding on to that last shred of hope for a (blunder, mistake or inaccuracy) is a tactic unto itself, that's one thing.

Another is acting like my friends opponent, I'm willing to defend not resigning when there's a glimmer of hope for some tactic, blunder and or inaccuracy.

But to be fair, the next question that begs to be asked is, what if the opponent just doesn't see that they're done.

It's not an easy topic.

I am too shy and undecisive to choose when to resign, so I only surrender when my opponent asks me to do so.

uh no. you should just learn KR/K mate.

hey could you play about 10 games with me and then resign every one of them?

nah jk