Why are my game calculations WAY higher than ELO??

It's a popular feature. Many find it helpful. Like Game Review as a whole, it needs to be taken with a grain of salt. Who doesn't know that?

In any case, Game Review is optional. Anyone who thinks it's so bad that its developers, or chess.com, should be ashamed of themselves, can easily avoid it.

https://support.chess.com/en/articles/10773754-how-is-game-rating-calculated-in-game-review

"Performance ratings are harder to assess when there is a large rating gap between opponents. This is especially true in bot games, where players often choose to challenge higher-rated bots to test their skills or compare their play without affecting their actual rating. Because of this rating disparity, performance ratings in bot games may sometimes seem inconsistent."

-chess.com

It would actually be pretty useful if there were separate metrics for games vs bots — just to keep things clearer and not mix them up with games against real players.

A lot of people don't know that. Like for example the guys who ask about it in this very topic.

As for your "grain of salt", it has to be a huge grain to transform a 2400 estimate into 1050.

Clearly. That's exactly why I'm here and have said what I've said. Again, it's a popular feature, and as long as you bear in mind that it's not about anything other than assessing your performance in one game, it can be useful.

Big numbers right beneath profile pictures in the analysis expand egos

Not always, I still dont understand how I could get to 1400+

"I played like a 2000, you say?"

It's more likely to err on the high side, for obvious reasons.

That makes a lot of sense

Yeah. We'd all be trashing it if we kept feeling disrespected, LOL.