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1000 Signs you play chess too LITTLE!

  • #101

    137. You don't think of Napoleon as primarily a chess player.

  • #102

    139. You think the queen only move on white cases in nowadays normal chess (ie, not in a variant.)

  • #103

    140. You think this is monopoly, and that you can buy squares to get your properties. You then ask your opponenent, "Where's the money to buy the properties??"

  • #104

    141. You buy extra chess pieces to put on the board

  • #105

    When you checkmate somebody, you tell their king to go directly to jail and do not pass go.

  • #106

    You ask the person your playing how the horsee moves?  Wink

  • #107

    145. You like monopoly more than chess.

  • #108

    146. you don't like violence against queen and king. instead you demonstrate peacefully against monarchy.

    147. you take pieces by jumping over them with your queen

    148. you use your chess board as dinner tray

  • #109

    149. you call the police if someone wants to play bullet with you

    150. you try to feed the horsies

    151. if your opponent says check, you say "I raise by 50 bucks"

    152. you try to cure the bishop from his obsessive-compulsive disorder, because he online steps on fields with equal color

    153. you think its pervert to beat the queen

  • #110

    151, lol.

  • #111

    154. You never met a premature queen user.

    155. You don't understand why the king is not more powerfull than the queen.

  • #112

    156. You think zugzwang is the german word for a mishit golf shot

    157. You think zwischenzug is the german word for switcheroo

  • #113

    156.Your opponent says checkmate and you think check got married.

    157. You play chess with checkers pieces.

  • #114

    158. You insist on promoting your pawn to a fox. Hey! dumb horses are allowed...

  • #115

    159. You call rooks "castles"
    160. You think that "check" means to check the board for queen threats
    161. You call knights "horseys" or "horse"
    162. You insist that having adjacent kings is perfectly legal
    163. You checkmate by putting your king adjacent to your opponent's king and think it is checkmate because your king is protected
    164. You get mated by Fool's Mate
    165. You get mated by Scholar's Mate
    166. You think queens can move in L shapes
    167. You insist on promoting to another king
    168. You think you have to checkmate the queen
    169. You take the queen over the king
    170. You think chess notation is some kind of spy code
    171. You think you can escape checkmate
    172. You capture pieces like you would in a game of checkers
    173. You use checkers to replace the pawns you are missing
    174. You don't know who Magnus Carlsen is
    174. You call youself a GM when you reach a rating of 750
    175. You play chess like giveaway
    176. The only way you can win is to be loud and distract your opponent

  • #116

    you hit your opponent whenever he wins you.

  • #117

    177. You waste your time deciding which pawn to push.

  • #118

    178. Your pawn reaches the back rank and you proudly proclaim, "King me!"

  • #119

    180. White plays 1. e4 and you resign, thinking you're in zugzwang.

  • #120

    181. Your online chess rating is still 1200.


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