269)when someone says checkmate you think an australian person is checking you
270. You think "blundering" is when you calculate moves outloud.
271. You never play standard time, because you think you have to stand up for 15 minutes while playing.
272. When your opponent uses en passant, you report them to staff for hacking.
1000. You look at this list and realize you do some/all of these things.
hey you can't just skip to 1000
274) you get your king to the end of the board and try to promote
275. You think that pawn pushing is when you push your pawn over
276. You think pushing your king over is an excellent defense for your king becuse it's ducking behind the pawns
277. You think the dragon variation in the sicilian is when you call in a dragon to checkmate the king
278. You see this diagram and can't find the mate:
279. You think you castle like this
280. You only play openings that corresponde to where you live Italian, English, London, French, King's indian, Queen's indian, etc.
281. You don't want to take any pawns because you think that they are cute.
286. you have a rating of 0
289. You forget the difference between shogi and chess
290. You think the starting position is just another interesting chess 960 position.
292. you think the knight moves up and then back to the square it was on
293. You debate with your opponent on establishing democracy of the pieces instead of playing the game.