1000 things a dumb chess player would do

keep texting all his betches while playing

You have -2000 elo rating

i love raphael

what the flip

put his hand and smell himself during a game

yeah that would suck

This actually happened to me once OTB I realized my opponents time ran out 3 or 5 moves later

Didn't notice that they could give a checkmate and win the game.

All dumb players are hypnotized by their own plans and options and completely ignore those of their opponents.

He thought that the floor is lava, so the pieces on the 1st rank could not move, leaving him with using only pawns the whole game.

142.

Convinces the arbiters that his queen is lesbian, therefore his king is replaced with a second queen and he loses automatically.

143. cheats

comment deleted by mod CR

1000. he plays chess

plays something else while playing chess

look in every place they could get their queen taken from exept for right in front of them

e4 then Nf6 and then they play qh5

149.

Sacrifices himself to save his knight.

He would ask his OTB opponent "What do you think of my last move, cool right?" while pointing at the pieces he just forked with his knight.

151- Kills his opponent for real at the start of the game and says, "checkmate"