Slip out the back, Jack.
50 ways to forfeit a chess game

Dang it batgirl, I had that exact same idea when I saw the title but you were too fast.
I waited 39.5 hours, then gave in.

Hop on th Horse Morris, Drop off the King Ming, and dont you let that Bishop Sing, as the Pawns get pinged.

...just promote the queen, Sting, fly like an eagle, beagle, you don't need the seagull when you've got the parakeet, McNeagle, cause every move you make, I'll be resigning on you and every breath you take I'll be whining about you and ---
oh, hello there everyone! Ha-ha, I didn't know anyone was listening in!
One of these nights, I'm gonna realize that the peephole are listening in; one of these knights, one of these crazy old knights, we're gonna find out, pretty mama, who turned out the lights on my chess game. Swear I'm gonna find out, one of these kni-i-i-i-ights.

Ragequit retro style like Curt von Bardelebem in his lost position vs Steinitz. He left the hall and didn't return.
So distraught was von Bardelebem by this loss that he even attempted to withdraw from the tournament. Previously he had been in superb form with 7.5/9 but following this game his play deteriorated. However he finished a still creditable 7th with 11.5. Steinitz finished 5th on 13 and the tournament was won by Pillsbury on 16.5, 1/2 a point ahead of Chigorin.
There's 50 ways to do a lot of things...
So post your
50 ways to forfeit a chess game!
Remember, anything is possible!
Ready? Sego!
1. Get leaped on by a knight.