Signs you play too much chess.

You call cars "rooks."

You compulsively fill in every other square whenever you get a fresh sheet of graph paper.

Whenever you slap the snooze button on your alarm clock, you're surprised when no one else slaps it afterwards.

You like checkered clothing because you know that, should civilization suddenly fail and plunge into chaos, at least you'll be wearing a chess board, wherever it is you end up hiding from the apocalypse.

For that reason, you always carry a full set of chess pieces with you.

It makes you very uncomfortable whenever a priest walks straight down the aisle in church: you think they ought to zig-zag.

When joggers run past you, you have to resist the urge to kick them in the shins and say, "en passant."

Not very funny ...

Well that's unfortunate.

Your right, but I can't relate... :(

Agreed!

Nah - the third and last were pretty good.

Agreed with the third but not with the last..

I probably need to know more about chess to have more fodder for puns and whatnot.

You know, you guys can feel free to contribute, too.

too much computer ....can cause a straight cervical spine. Your neck should have a nice curve...

I like to contribute soon Japaroads, keep up the good work!

Wow Japaroads, I read the first post and laughed, and thought to send it to you, only then I realized you posted it...

Hahaha, thanks, darling. I'm glad I make you laugh.

Hilarious! lol!