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7. Draws will be resolved by who can drink more water in 30 seconds.
8. If a player does not resign when he is hopelessly lost, his opponent may remove 3 of his pieces(besides the king) at the beginning of the next game between the 2 players.
9. No one can leave chess club or you will be physically and mentally exterminated.
10. One "bombing" ((capturing all pieces(besides king)in a 2x2 area of the board) per 50 moves per side, though none on 2x2 grids with 15 points or more of material.
11. No checks unless it is checkmate.
12. You will not "check" or "checkmate" you will show no mercy and take the opponent's king.
13. Do not play without spending $998,354,364,575,675,647,674,545,346,534,657 worth of club merchadise beforehand.
See, good efforts one and all, but, as moderator of this post, I must insist on more...violence. Please continue.
14. Losers of games must select which finger to have amputated. Chess Club does not tolerate losers.
Next?
15. When you lose a piece you should have 30 arm hairs pulled out.
See...no. Right idea, wrong execution. Next please.
The winner gets to really keep the captured pieces. The loser has to buy new ones.
Everytime you lose you must get into a fight with a random member of public
This week, each one of you has a homework assignment. You're going to go out and start a chess game with a total stranger...
You're going to start a chess game...and you're going to lose.
Now this is not as easy as it sounds. Most people, normal people, do just about anything to avoid a chess game.
Wow, those last two were GREAT! Straight from the movie. Yes. NEXT...
Shin kicks are not allowed in Chess Club!
neneko wrote:
Now this is not as easy as it sounds. Most people, normal people, do just about anything to avoid a chess game.
I burst out laughing, and I'm at work, so that's not really a good thing.
You are not a Capablanca; you are the same blundering patzer as the rest of us.
mercytononeZ wrote: 15. When you lose a piece you should have 30 arm hairs pulled out.
OWwwwwwwww, Ouch
I trust you've all seen this?
"I want you to check me as hard as you can..."
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R3rryxkgx9g
I'm totally stealing this idea from Western_Burn, but here goes...
What are the rules of Chess Club?
- You don't talk about Chess Club.
- If it's your first time here, you gotta play Erik.
- You don't talk about Chess Club.
- When playing Brad Pitt you get Queen odds.
- There is no crying in Chess Club. (Or in baseball.)
- No freestyling during games.
I'm fresh out of "funny" rules. Anyone else have any?